


100 Sevasey Drabbles

by FrankieFandom



Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drabble Collection, Episode Related, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One Shot, Sexual Content, Tumblr Prompt, Whump, hurt!Casey, hurt!Severide, sick!Casey, sick!Severide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-15 01:21:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 100
Words: 24,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8036722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrankieFandom/pseuds/FrankieFandom
Summary: A mixture of drabbles and short one-shots.





	1. Strolling

Casey looked up from the dining room table to see Severide stroll past. "Er Sev…"

"Uh huh?" He smiled at Casey's reddening cheeks.

"Trying to work here…" Casey said awkwardly.

"Oh sorry… you don't have to look," he replied although he knew full well Casey had little option sitting on the level he was.

"Erm you're strolling round naked, it's kinda hard not to," Casey blushed trying to avert his eyes.

"I'm just enjoying my freedom," Severide smirked.

"Go and enjoy it somewhere else," Casey stated. "And don't go outside… No matter how good you look you will get arrested," he added as an afterthought.


	2. Black Tag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3.19 I Am Apocalypse

"Hey," Severide croaked out and he smiled tiredly as Casey jerked awake. "Thought you were gonna be out for ages," he smirked as he watched Casey realise he was sprawled in an easy chair and not lying on a bed.

"Long day," he said tiredly once he'd gathered his senses.

"You're telling me," Severide mocked.

"They were going to black tag you," Casey commented and a look of disbelief crossed Severide's face. "They don't know how stubborn you are... Are you in pain?" he asked as Severide winced when he used the bed controls to sit up.

"I'm fine," he replied evenly.

Casey raised his eyebrows, he didn't believe a word but knew he'd say the same. "You're an idiot."

"How's your head?" Severide questioned, they'd all been knocked out by the explosion.

"My head?" Casey asked with a frown.

"Yeah the one you cracked a year ago," he replied with concern.

"I'm fine. I'm not the idiot who jumped a suicide bomber," Casey scoffed.

"You'd had done it if you were stood where I was," he replied simply.

"All the guys are outside," Casey stated.

"You better send them in then," Severide replied tiredly. "And Case?"

"Yeah?" He turned back to face him as he was heading out the room.

"Go out with them tonight, don't hang round here after visiting hours are up; I _am_ fine," Severide reassured him.


	3. Cold

"You all right there, Case?" Severide had just walked in to the apartment to find Casey huddled over on the sofa covered by several blankets.

"Can you not tell how cold it is?" Casey scoffed.

"I guess..." he replied. He'd just been in his warm car so of course everything else felt cold.

"The power's been out all night," Casey replied glumly. "Why don't we have a gas boiler?" he groaned.

"Ah, well, maybe I can do something about that," Severide smirked.


	4. Something Stronger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2.17 When Things Got Rough

"Where's Casey?" Severide question after glancing around Molly's.

"Probably gone home," Dawson dismissed his concerns.

 _"Or something stronger."_ Casey's earlier words came back to mind and Severide took off.

He found him in a bar several blocks away.

"Thought you were all right after what you said at Molly's?" Severide questioned as he stood by him, concerned that he had barely acknowledged his presence.

"You know, it's nearly been a year," Casey slurred.

"Yeah I know." And he sat and joined him at the bar.


	5. Panic

"We shouldn't be doing this; not here," Casey breathed heavily.

"Don't be such a wuss," Severide mocked.

"What if someone comes in?" he panicked.

Severide shrugged and a smile spread broadly across his face at Casey's panic. "No one's going to come in."

"The alarms will go off," he said quickly.

Severide smirked. "I _know_ you can dress quickly."

"We're in the squad rig..." Casey groaned.

"We'll be quick." Severide grinned.


	6. Little Comforts

"Give us a minute?" Severide wanted some privacy and was glad the paramedic moved aside. "You ok?" He'd hardly been able to hide his concern when Casey had been taken off to the back of the ambulance after being led out the building putting most his weight on Cruz.

Casey grimaced. "Sore."

"Broken?" he asked.  
  
Casey shook his head slowly, his ears were ringing.  
  
"You're bleeding," Severide stated and he brought a hand up to Casey's face gently wiped away the blood that had dried on chin and forehead. "What happened?"

"Step gave way," Casey replied simply.

Severide saw the paramedic edging closer, he squeezed Casey's hand. "I'll see you at the hospital," he said before retreating back to the Squad truck.

Casey smiled at the little comfort when he watched Severide walk away as he cradled his wrist.


	7. Socks

Severide was sitting at the squad table when his phone alerted him of a message.  
  
 _'Locker room now xx'_

With a smile on his face Severide made his way into the locker room after being cornered by Connie. He heard a shower running, he entered the steamy bathroom and pulled back the curtain to find Casey under the hot stream.

His eyes lit up and he grinned broadly. "Took you long enough."

Severide stood staring at him and the water showered his smooth body.

"Come on then." Casey smiled and leaned forward and pulled Severide's top up and off.

Quickly Severide unfastened his belt, kicked off his shoes, dropped his pants and boxers and stepped under the stream with his feet still clad in black socks.


	8. Tears

"Where is he?" Severide asked as he reached the waiting room.

"Third door on the left," Antonio replied. "He said he doesn't want to see anyone."

Severide ignored him and walked straight into Casey's room.

He was a mess of cuts and bruises.

"Matt?"

Casey turned his tear stricken face away from the window towards him. His lip quivered and the tears fell once more.

"Hey." Severide moved swiftly over to the bed. "You're ok now, you're safe, I promise. Tell me his name?"

Casey shook his head. "I can't."

"Case? Tell me his name," Severide repeated, "I'm going to kill whoever it was for what they did to you."

Tears continued to stream down Casey's bruised face. "I can't," his breath hitched, "He said he'd come back and do it again, I can't, it hurts."

Severide leant over and embraced Casey's quivering body as it was wracked with sobs of growing intensity. "Shh... you're ok, you're ok. I'm never going to let anything happen to you again."


	9. Three AM

Several loud bangs woke him up.

He blearily looked at the digital alarm clock.   
  
03:06.   
  
He pulled the duvet back up and over his head.

The knocking continued.

He groaned and got out of bed. He tripped on a shoe as he made his way to the front door.

"What the hell Kelly?!" he raised his voice as he opened his front door.

Severide was standing, actually, he was leaning on the door frame, his eyes were bloodshot and his cheeks were flushed.

"You're drunk," he stated the obvious. "And how did you even get this address?"

"Hallie..." Severide muttered.

"Oh. What are you even doing here? It's 3am..."

"I'm sorry. I hate it when we argue," Severide slurred, "Didn't know where to go, not now... not now Andy's gone..."

"Come in."


	10. Bae

Casey looked up from the Scrabble board. "That is not a real word."

"Yes it is," Severide smirked.

"No, there's no way that's real word. Where's the dictionary?"

Severide shrugged. "I dunno."

"Yeah, see, you've hidden it because you know it's not a real word," he countered.

"But you're my _bae._ " Severide grinned.

"You're a teenage girl now?" Casey laughed, shaking his head. "It isn't a real word."


	11. Ribs

"Casey?!" Severide scrambled over to where the truck lieutenant had fallen, his whole body protested at the movement but it was the last thing on his mind.

"Eugh..." he heard Casey groan as consciousness came to him.

"Don't move," Severide warned, "You could have done some serious damage to your spine."

"I think I'm all right..." Casey croaked. The dust in the air felt like it was choking him.

"Just take it slowly then," Severide advised just as he reached him.

Slowly Casey rolled onto his back and push himself back onto a cement slab that had fallen with them. "Oh..." he breathed, he was looking down at his chest. "Think that might be my rib..."

"Oh God..." Severide uttered out of Casey's earshot.

"I think I might pass out," he slurred.

"What never seen your own rib before?" Severide said lightly as he tried to keep the mood upbeat to keep his friend from unconsciousness.

"Ha," he said dryly, "Very funny."


	12. Shot

"Hey," Severide greeted softly. "You're in post op. I'll get the doc," he explained before he stood up from the stool.

"Wait..." Casey muttered barely audibly.

"You in pain?" he asked.

"Everyone ok?" Casey slurred.

"Is... is everyone ok? Casey, you were shot and you're asking if everyone else is ok?" Severide said incredulously.

"Sorry," he breathed.

"Other than being worried about you because of your recklessness everyone is fine," Severide said almost cruelly, he was still annoyed at Casey's actions even though it had saved lives of his crew and two victims.

"Sor..." Casey began but his eyes closed and his head fell to one side just before the monitors started beeping and team of doctors and nurses rushed over.

"His pressure's bottomed out, he must be bleeding out," one said hurriedly as the bed covers were pushed back to reveal a growing red patch.

"Get him to an OR!" another called out and suddenly Casey was being whisked away and Severide wished he'd not let his anger get the better of him.


	13. Shot II

"Matt Casey's family?" a man in scrubs questioned after he'd walked into the waiting room.

"Is he ok?" Severide asked horridly as he shot up from his seat.

"He lost a lot of blood; there was a small tear in his spleen. We managed to repair it but he'd already gone into hypovolemic shock causing his heart to stop during the surgery…"

Severide stood frozen, shocked at what he was hearing. "But he's ok now?" he questioned urgently.

"He's not out of the woods yet, we need to do some further tests, but you can come and see him quickly if you want," the surgeon explained.

"When will he wake up?" Severide felt so guilty for angrily going on at Casey about his recklessness he wanted to make everything right between the two of them.

"The anaesthesia will wear off within the hour but he may not wake then," he replied and then Severide followed him into the post-operative ward.


	14. Naked (Well, Nearly)

Three heavy knocks at the door abruptly woke Severide from his slumber. He groaned and rolled over. "CASEY?!" he called out; "Get the door!"

It was Casey's turn to groan and roll over, he'd heard the knocking and had dismissed it hoping Severide would get but apparently he couldn't possibly get out of bed. He groaned once more before throwing back the covers and walking dejectedly to the front door.

"Cruz?" he questioned once he'd swing the door open

"Erm... hey lieutenant," Cruz greeted rather bashfully.

"You ok?" he croaked out as he rubbed his eyes of sleep.

"Is Severide in? I tried calling him…" Cruz trailed off.

Casey sighed. "Sev!" he called out.

Stumbling out of his room Severide raised his voice in annoyance. "I thought you were getting…" And then realised Casey and Cruz were stood at the door. "Oh."

"Do you two ever wear clothes?" Cruz bemused.

Simultaneously Casey and Severide looked down at their black boxers. Severide shrugged.  
  
Casey opened his mouth, hesitated and then indicated further into the apartment, "Come in Cruz. But don't mind me, I am going to bed." He glared playfully at Severide who just grinned back.


	15. Close Call

"Hey," Casey said softly as he limped into the lounge area. "You coming to bed?"

"Later." Severide sighed. He was slumped over on the couch nursing a bottle of beer and looking blankly at the TV screen.

Slowly Casey sat down, wincing ever so slightly as he did. "Are you ok?" he asked with concern.

Severide exhaled. "It was a close last night."

"We've had close calls before." Casey shrugged.

"You could have been seriously hurt… or worse," Severide said, exasperated.

"That's why it's called a close call." Casey smiled lightly, concerned about the thoughts going through his partners head. "I'm fine, Sev."

Severide wrapped his arm around Casey's. "I don't know what I'd do without you…"

"Feeling's mutual." Casey smiled. " _So_ let's agree to only have close calls and nothing more."


	16. Shock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU 4.04 Your Day Is Coming
> 
> WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

"I'm so sorry, Casey," Severide spoke up. Casey hadn't moved since the surgeon had left. The rest of the house were stood around him in shock at the news. "Let's get you home," Severide said and he put an arm around him to help him move out of the waiting room.

"No..." Casey breathed. "I want to see her."

Severide looked towards Boden questioningly and when the chief nodded he spoke again. "I'll go and ask when you can see her."

Soon Casey was stood beside Dawson's lifeless body, he still couldn't believe that all of this had really happened, he felt like he was trapped in a nightmare but it was real and Severide was by his side comforting him.


	17. Eggs

"Do you want tomato?" Casey called from the kitchen.

Severide snuck in, wrapped a bare arm around Casey's waist and pulled him back towards himself.

"Watch it! Do you want burnt eggs?" He grinned back at Severide over his shoulder.

"I want you in the shower right now," Severide muttered into Casey's ear whilst resting his chin on his shoulder and tightening his arm around his waist.

Casey turned off the gas.


	18. Black and Blue

"What happened?" Severide asked with concern as he watched Casey slip his grey polo top on in the locker room.

"Oh, nothing." He shrugged.

"Nothing? You're black and blue," Severide said with worry.

"Just happened on a call, nothing to worry about," he dismissed, annoyed Severide had walked in on him changing.

"They're not fresh," Severide stated.

"Never said it was from today," he replied.

"Some of them look older than others," Severide noted.

Angered at Severide's persistence Casey raised his voice. "Just leave it will you!"

Casually he asked, "You seeing anyone at the moment?"

"Why is it any of your business?" Casey said disgruntled.

"Because you're my friend," he urged.

"I didn't think we were friends at the moment." Casey scoffed and walked out the locker room leaving Severide stood alone.


	19. Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post 1.13 Warm and Dead

"Hey," Casey greeted softly when he saw Severide wake and glance around the hospital room. "Shay's just gone to get coffee," he explained before frowning wondering whether or not he was wanted here. "I can go if you want?"

"I'm still high," Severide stated, gazing up at the tiled ceiling.

"You're not in any pain then?" Casey asked seriously.

"Nope, zip, nada, zilch…" Severide slurred making him scoff with laughter.

"Do you want a drink?" he asked and Severide nodded so he proceeded to lean over the bed slightly to pass him the cup of water.

"You've got really pretty eyes." Severide beamed.

"Thanks Kelly."


	20. Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: SELF HARM

"Case?" Severide knocked on the bathroom door. His roommate hadn't responded since he'd returned home from ten minutes ago. Casey had been out of sorts all night and had disappeared home without telling him. In fact he hadn't been himself for weeks now. He knocked again. "Case? You ok bud?"

"I'm fine," he heard Casey's muffled reply.

"You're fine?" he questioned. "What are you doing? You don't usually lock the door..."

"I'm fine, you can leave me alone."

"No, I can't," he replied. "Please can you let me in? Just so I can see for myself that you're fine."

"You'll just have to trust me."

"Look, if I have to break down this..." he raised his voice but stopped when he heard the bathroom door click as it was unlocked.

"Kelly," Casey began quietly, "Please don't hate me."

"Why would I hate you?" Severide questioned, becoming more and more concerned about him.

"I'm sorry," Casey muttered as Severide opened the door.

"Matt," he breathed as he saw the state of the bathroom and his friend. He took hold of Caseys wrist and his friend look away. "Why?" He frowned as he studied the wrist, "How long have you been doing this?"

"I'm sorry."

"No. Don't say that. Don't apologise. Why?" Severide asked again.

"I just wanted to... I just need to feel something else."


	21. Cream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1.18 Fireworks

Severide found Casey in the locker room attempting to reach around his back to rub some cream into one of the minor burns he'd received when the ceiling had collapsed during their call this morning. "You all right?"

"Fine," he stated.

"Looks sore, let me give you hand," Severide suggested and he extended his hand out.

Casey looked down at the pot of cream in his hand then passed it over to Severide. "Thanks."

Severide put some cream of the tips of his fingers and went to rub it gently onto Casey's back.

"Ah!" he yelped.

"What?" Severide was suddenly concerned he'd caused pain.

"Your hand is freezing," he explained.

Severide sighed, glad he'd not further aggravated the wound. "Well, suck it up, should have asked Dawson if you wanted comfort."

"I didn't ask, you offered," Casey stated.

"Because it's impossible for Lieutenant Casey to ask for help," he mocked. "There, I'm done."

Casey put his shirt back on. "Your dad still staying with you?"

"Unfortunately," he admitted.

"Oh, I thought it'd be nice to have him stay…" Casey began.

"No, dad's make a habit of… Oh God…" he sighed, "I'm sorry Casey."

"It's fine," Casey shrugged. "I'm getting some food."

Severide watched as he walked out the locker room, annoyed at himself for his careless use of words.


	22. Hallie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU 1.24 A Hell of a Ride

"Don't you eat?" Severide surveyed the barely eaten days old take away food. No wonder he'd lost weight.

"Don't eat, don't sleep," Casey said freely. "What do you think the alcohol is for?"

"You need some proper food, some proper sleep," he responded having seen the makeshift bed on the couch.

"What I _need_ is for this to be over," Casey said harshly.

"Neither of us can go back and change anything, but I can help now," he replied.

"Why'd you come over?" Casey snarled, he made to walk for the front to door as if to get rid of Severide but he stumbled and ended up on the couch. Severide wanted to tell him about the news he'd received, about Renee's return, her pregnancy, but it was now inappropriate. "To check on me?" Casey blurted out. "I don't need checking on."

"Clearly you do, Case," he said. "Come on, you should get some sleep, I'll get us some food, tidy up, you need some rest on a proper bed."

"I can't," Casey replied eying his bedroom door, "Her pyjamas are on the bed."

"Ok, stay here, I'm going to sort your spare room out, you can sleep in there, then we're going to eat," Severide said.


	23. Tired

"Case?" Severide was concerned, Casey had just walked into their apartment, flung his jacket off and loosened his tie; he looked worn down, upset.

"I'm tired," Casey responded wearily as he went over to the coffee machine.

Casey wasn't lying, he was tired, but Severide was sure it wasn't just physical exhaustion. He was emotionally spent, he could see the tears brewing in his eyes, watery and wide, everything was getting to him. "Case?"

He sighed as he waited for the coffee. "I'm so tired," he admitted when he found Severide's eyes looking straight at him, imploringly. "I'm tired of this."

"Case, stop," Severide instructed as his friend proceeded to empty the dishwasher when all he had wanted was one mug. "Talk to me." Casey placed a plate on the worktop then stood still, his back to him. "Matt?"

He turned around. "She wants to foster a kid," Severide frowned and Casey continued, "She doesn't want to marry me, she's happy with the way things are... But she wants me to foster a kid with her. She said I was too busy and I accepted that. I tell her that I'm too busy and she doesn't speak to me. I don't know what I'm doing. I thought she wanted to me to run for Alderman... And now I'm so tired and I feel like I'm not making any difference. This is going to end us." His eyes had welled up and there was a single tear making its way down his cheek.

Severide didn't know what to say. "Matt I..."

Casey scoffed. "What do I do?"

"You must be desperate asking me for advice." He offered with a smile.

Casey was biting his lower lip, a second tear had joined the first, he shook his head, shaking away his tears, his sadness, his frustration and annoyance. "I'm going to do whatever I can to make sure she gets what she wants."

"What about what you want?" Severide asked but Casey only shrugged. "What do you want?"

"I want her," Casey stated simply.

"At what cost?"  
  
He didn't respond.  
  
"Case?"

"I'm fine." He nodded and smiled thinly, his defences back in place as if he hadn't said anything, as if he hadn't stood in front of Severide and cried in desperation at the situation.


	24. Anger

Severide was sitting his quarters.

Casey knocked twice at his door.

"I'm sorry," Casey spoke sincerely.

Severide turned from the paperwork on his desk and shot daggers towards his former friend.

Casey's eyes were dull and it was clear he wasn't sleeping, how could he?

"I'm sorry," Casey repeated, he knew full well that Severide had heard him but what else could he say now.

"So you said," Severide replied derisively. It was clear that he was not sleeping either, and Casey thought he saw the glimmer of pain in Severide's expression.

Casey didn't know what to say, he wanted to apologise again, he wanted Severide to say that he too was sorry.

"Kelly…" Casey began imploringly.

"What is it, Casey?" Severide demanded. "Sorry isn't going to change anything, it's not going change what you did."

"What _I_ did?" Casey's temper was rising.

"You put him through that window," Severide stated harshly.

'I tried to stop him, he went through before you said you hadn't vented, I tried to pull him back,' Casey wanted to say but Severide's unusually harsh eyes and his heated words forced anger out of Casey. "You should have vented the back."


	25. Him

Shay opened the door to find Casey stood wearing just an old shirt and a pair of loose jeans, he was shivering from the cold. "What happened?" she exclaimed at the sight of his black eye and cut lip.

"I'm sorry it's late, I should have called," Casey responded as he looked miserably at the floor, his hair was jutting up at all angles and Shay just wanted to wrap her arm around his trembling form.

"You know you're welcome here whatever the time is, Matt," she replied with a soft smile. "Come in." She moved back to allow him entrance into the apartment.

"Is Kelly here?" he asked, still avoiding eye contact, as he walked into the warmth of the apartment.

"He's just in the shower, he won't be long," she explained. "I'll get you a hot drink, do you have a preference?"  
  
Casey shook his head.  
  
"Hot chocolate it is then, I can't bear to give you caffeine at this hour," she smiled.

Shay intercepted Severide as he exited the bathroom and informed him that Casey was sitting, still half frozen from the cold, sipping at a hot chocolate in the middle of their couch.

Severide slipped into some clothes and sat down on the coffee table in front of Casey. "Hey Case," he said softly.

"Hey," Casey replied tiredly, he sighed, "I'm sorry." He lifted his head, Severide got a better look at the bruise on Casey's face, his eye had swollen slightly but what concerned him the most was the bruises he spotted on Casey's arms because they weren't all new, they faded in intensity.

After a long stretch of silence Severide spoke up.  "Talk to me Matt, that's why you came, tell me what's happened."

Casey looked him in the eyes. "I'm in trouble."

"I can see that," Severide said with a smile, encouraging him to continue, he'd had his suspicions for weeks that something was terribly wrong.

"Please don't hate me." He sniffled, making him sound much younger than his years, the unkempt hair didn't help.

"I'll never hate you, Matt," Severide said.

"I'm sorry," Casey shook his head.

"Someone hit you more than once and not just tonight," Severide summarised, he glanced at Casey's hands, "And you didn't fight back."

"I don't know what to do." Tears began to trickle down Casey's face.

"You'll stay here tonight, tomorrow and the day after, however many days you need to," Severide said, "But you need to leave her, you can't stay with someone who…"

"Him," Casey corrected him.

Severide said nothing and continued. "You need to leave, change your locks, block his number and stay away from him."

Casey nodded. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," Severide reassured him. "And I'm glad you're here, I'm glad you told me."

"No, I'm sorry that I didn't do anything, I didn't hit him back, I'm sorry," Casey muttered.

Severide stood up from the coffee table and sat next to Casey. "Come here." He put his arm round his shoulders, pulled him gently towards him and waited for him to relax in his embrace. "Don't ever apologise for that, I'm sure that would have only made it worse." He sighed and asked, "Why did you wait so long to tell me? You know you can tell me anything."

"It's embarrassing, I'm a man, I'm a firefighter, an officer, I box, I know how to fight back… and…" Casey hesitated, "… And he said he was sorry, said he wouldn't do it again but… but this time he went too far and I don't think I even did anything wrong…"

"You never did anything wrong Case," he replied softly, gently squeezing his shoulders.


	26. Ladder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2.01 A Problem House

The ladder fell and the clang of metal was sickening.

"Casey!"

He held onto the hose as tightly as he could but his whole right side was on fire.

Severide appeared through the window. He scrambled to hold Casey's struggling form.

"I've got you."

Casey tried to grip the wall with his boots. He tried to push himself up.

Severide could barely hold him. His gear alone was 150lbs.

"I'm not going to let you slip. Stop struggling!"

Casey grabbed onto the window ledge.

Mills and Otis were at Severide's back. "Pull!"

Finally Casey was being pulled over and into the building.

A scream slipped out of Casey's mouth as he hit the floor.

"Chief we need another ambo!"

"I'm…"

"Don't even say it Casey."

Severide grabbed Casey's shoulder to stop him from moving with one hand, he squeezed Casey's hand with the other.

His breaths were quick and short.

"Breathe for me Case. Squeeze my hand."

Casey's eyes were shut tight in pain. He held Severide's hand so tight he thought it would break.

It didn't take long for the pain to knock him out.


	27. You're Ok

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 4.07 Sharp Elbows

Severide was piling up the blocks of cribbing beneath the victim. He didn't see the car hit Casey but he heard it. The car screeched. Casey hit the bonnet and slammed into the windscreen. There was a sickening thud as he hit the glass. The car came to a stop. There was another thud as Casey's limp body hit the ground. Severide turned just in time to see Casey hit the ground in front of the car.

"Lieutenant!" Borelli yelled.

"Casey?" Severide stood up from his crouched position and was about to run over to his fallen friend.

"Severide," Patterson said harshly.

"You've got plenty of men here," he stated before radioing through to control, "We need another ambulance!"  
  
Borelli was knelt down by Casey's unmoving form. Severide dropped to his knees by Casey's side.

"Brett go to Casey," Patterson ordered.

"Case? Buddy?" Severide tried to wake him. There was blood streaming down Casey's forehead and from his nose, images of his friend in the back of the ambulance nearly two years ago shot to the forefront of his mind. "Come on Case, you're ok," he said, partly to calm his own nerves.

"Jimmy get a backboard from the ambo," Brett ordered as she got to Casey.

Severide shook his head in despair as Brett looked at him after checking Casey's pulse and respiration. "Lieutenant?"

A groan emanated from Casey's lips.  
  
"Casey?" Severide questioned, "Speak to me bud."

Another groan. Casey's eyes flickered open momentarily. "Ow…"

Severide smiled in relief. "Thank God... Casey," he muttered. "Case you need to stay awake for us now, ok? Say something again Case…"

Brett was bent over Casey now, checking his pupillary reaction. "Lieutenant? Do you know what happened?"  
  
Casey's brows bunched up in confusion as Brett affixed the c-collar.

"Case, bud, do you know where you are?" Severide asked, concerned for his mental state.  
  
Casey didn't answer. He moved, tried to sit up, all he knew right now was that he was uncomfortable and his head hurt like hell.

"Whoa... no, Casey, I need you to stay still," Brett said quickly as she and Severide pinned him back down to the ground. "Won't be much longer," she said just as Borelli appeared with the backboard. "Let's move him on three…"

"Sev?" Casey frowned, stopping the move from the ground to the back board, the ambulance sirens could be heard in the distance.

"Yeah bud, I'm here," Severide smiled down at him.  
  
Casey looked up at him questioningly.  
  
"You've hit your head," he explained grimly but he was actually satisfied to see the recognition of the implications cross Casey's eyes. Severide grabbed Casey's hand, stopping him from touching his head. "You're alert, you're fine, it'll just be a concussion, you're ok," he smiled reassuringly, hoping to believe his own words.

They moved him onto the backboard. Severide stayed with him as Brett joined Chilli. Just as Ambulance 61 pulled away with the victim the second ambulance arrived. Casey was unconscious by the time they reached the hospital.

Severide paced the waiting room as the rest of the house sat around in their turnout gear. Borelli looked like he was going to hurl. He explained what had happened and Severide was sure that Casey wouldn't lay blame, even if he wanted to yell at the guy right now.

The doctor appeared. "He's all right."  
  
Severide let out a sigh of relief.  
  
"He has a severe concussion, but there's no bleeding, only minimal swelling, we're going to monitor him closely for the next twenty-four hours because of his history. He's bruised and sore but he's very lucky, no broken bones, no internal bleeding. He's getting some stitches at the moment but he can have some visitors, one at a time."

Severide walked into the bay Casey was lying in. "You look like hell," he stated when he saw that Casey was awake.

"Hi..." Casey muttered as he looked at Severide through half lidded eyes.

"Hi." Severide smiled and sat by his side as the nurse finished his stitches.


	28. Four Days

"Hey," Casey greeted softly as he walked into his apartment. The lights were off, the curtains were closed and Severide was sitting on his couch. He'd been there for four days.

"How was shift?" Severide spoke monotonously. He was only asking out of habit.

Casey squeezed his arm comfortingly and knelt down in front of him. He places his hands on Severide's legs and looked up at him with doe eyes.

"Should we stay in together and watch crap on TV? Or do you want to go out for the day? Get some fresh air. Or we could go out tonight, get drunk, crawl home in the early hours of the morning…" Casey shrugged, it wasn't the best idea but he wanted to get Severide of the couch.

It had been four days since Shay's funeral and Casey just wanted to make him happy.


	29. Shot III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

Severide sat by Casey's side for two days waiting for him to wake up.  
  
Waiting for a change.  
  
Hoping for a change.

The constant sound of the ventilator was oddly comforting.

He held Casey's warm hand.

The doctors were less and less hopeful.

Too much damage.

Too much time without oxygen.

Severide wouldn't believe it so he sat by his side for two days.

He yelled at him.

He apologised.

He cried by his side.

He begged him to wake up.

Casey died at 11:34 on a Thursday morning surrounded by his friends as Severide held his hand and spoke words of comfort.


	30. Just Us

The heat was stifling. Casey was spread out on the left hand side of the bed, the covers were lying haphazardly in between him and Severide. The fan was whirling above them. Casey's black boxers slipped ever so slightly as he moved from his back to his side, he struggled to find a comfortable position to sleep in, he was too hot, his skin was sticky and the air was humid. The fan just seemed to swirl the hot air around, it was on its last legs, it had been at the bottom of his to-do list over winter and now it was the height of summer and he regretted putting it off.

Just as he was finally drifting off to sleep Severide woke up with a start. He'd been having nightmares for weeks.

"Sev?" Casey questioned softly in the darkness.

"I'm fine," came the tired response. He wasn't fine. Casey knew it would take a while for him to fall back to sleep now that he'd woken in distress.

"Come here." Casey pushed the bed covers away and edged towards his boyfriend who'd rolled over to face him, Casey wrapped an arm around him. "It's ok, I mean it's not ok, everything's crap right now, but it will get better, it'll hurt a little less. I promise." Casey spoke from experience. "Right now just relax, try not to think of anything, listen to my breathing, it's just the two of us, we're the only ones in the world right now, just us and I'm not going to leave."


	31. Staring

Casey woke up slowly, he could feel Severide's heat beside him, he was comfortable and safe in the cocoon of bed covers. He'd quite happily lie there forever. He cracked open an eye expecting to see Severide fast asleep beside him.

"What are you doing?" he grumbled sleepily.

"Nothing," Severide responded. Severide was lying on his side, propped up on his right elbow and his left arm, Casey now realised, was lying across the bed covers over his side.

"How long have you been staring at me?" He frowned groggily.

"I'm not staring," Severide stated.

"You look suspiciously like you're staring," he said tiredly.

"You're adorable when you sleep." Severide smiled.

"Adorable?" He groaned. "Don't want to be associated with the word adorable…"

"Cute then," Severide grinned.

"Go back to sleep," he suggested and he rolled over so his back was facing Severide. He closed his eyes and tried to fall back to sleep only it felt like a pair of eyes were watching him, he rolled back over, Severide was in the same position staring at him. "Go to sleep. Don't stare at me."

"You're grouchy in the morning," Severide smiled.

"You were snoring all night," he explained.

"Oh yeah… I snore if I'm lying on my back, just push me over next time," Severide explained.

"Now you tell me," he grumbled. "Next time?"

"No?" Severide questioned.

"Next time sounds good."


	32. Marry Me

They were sitting at the dining room table.   
  
Casey was recalling Herrmann's antics.

"… I mean what did he think was going to happen?" He let out a laugh. "Sev?" he frowned but the smile still lingered on his face. "You're terrible." He shook his head, Severide had been distracted all day. "What's with you? ... What are you doing?" His expression transformed into one of confusion when Severide moved from his chair. "Sev? What are…"

"I'm getting down on one knee Matthew Casey, and I'm asking you to marry me," Severide explained.  
  
Casey's eyes remained on his as he moved around the table and got down on one knee, a small velvet box in one hand.  
  
"Will you marry me?"

Casey's mouth opened but his words caught in his throat. "I can't breathe…"

"That's a yes?" Severide grinned.

"Uh huh," he nodded slowly, mouth still open a little in surprise. "That's a yes."

"I was going to plan a big thing... Get a banner on the back of a plane... a romantic meal... a holiday in Paris so I could take you to the top of the Eiffel Tower... or at least get fireworks or something..." Severide opened the small velvet box to reveal the ring.

"There's fireworks going off in my head right now." Casey grinned.


	33. Beer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1.02 Mon Amour

"Casey?" He was shocked to find his fellow lieutenant stood outside his door.

"You never replied to my message," Casey stated.

Severide pulled his phone out of his jean pocket, he frowned. "You only text me an hour ago."

"Asking if you were ok. You didn't reply," he supplied.

"So you decided to come over?" Severide questioned

"I brought beer."


	34. Snap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This popped into my head when I heard we'll be getting an all Casey episode in season five but of course I'm sure Dawson will get some of the spotlight…. and it's unlikely Casey will get hurt but a girl can dream!

Severide rushed over when he saw Casey being led carefully to the back of an ambulance. It was dark. The lights from the emergency vehicles lit the sky.

"Casey!" Severide got his attention as he reached him, it felt like an age but he was eventually by his side, they'd been waiting around for news on him and the other victims for the best part of the afternoon and well into the evening.

"Sev?" Casey questioned when he realised he was by his side.

"Yeah." He smiled. "You're ok?" He looked him up and down. There was so much blood on his hands.

"I will be," Casey replied quietly.

"What hap…"

"Not now." They'll talk later, when Casey was ready.

"Ok." He placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

The paramedic was checking him over for injuries, asking him where he was hurt, if he was in any pain. "I'm ok, it's just my chest I think, it's not my blood... I think…" he trailed off. He was exhausted and in pain, he could just imagine the bruises forming on his chest in great big splotches of colour.

"Matt!" His name was called out, Severide took his hand away from his shoulder. "Matt..." Dawson was stood in front of him now. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." He forced a smile.

"Thank God, I was so worried." She leant in to hug him, she didn't notice him wince, the paramedic did, Severide did.

"I'm fine, you can stop worrying," he said lightly.

"Erm… I need to get back for Louie, it's late for the babysitter," she explained quickly, "You don't mind, do you?"

"Course not."  
  
Dawson left.

"Argh..." he groaned when the paramedic examined his chest.  "They're broken," he stated through gritted teeth, "I heard them snap."

"But you're fine?" Severide questioned incredulously.

"She's got Louie to worry about," he replied.

"We've got to take you in for an x-ray, make sure they're not displaced or causing any internal damage," the paramedic explained.

Severide hopped into the back of the ambulance. The journey was spent in silence until Casey spoke quietly. "Sev… it was..." he hesitated, "It was awful… I didn't think…"

"You're ok, and thanks to you everyone else is as well, you did good and you'll be ok eventually," Severide reassured him.


	35. I'm Ready

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

He was trapped.

They couldn't move him. He was bleeding out too fast. He'd die instantly if they tried.

Casey understood the situation as soon as Severide came into view.

He wasn't in pain. His spinal cord had been severed. He'd been given morphine.

But he didn't want to die delirious and out of his mind.

"It's ok, it's going to be ok." What else could Severide say?

He smiled up at him.

"I'm going to give you some more morphine and then..." Severide was crying. "Just tell me when you're ready."

"It's ok..." he breathed. "Don't do anything stupid after... don't..."

"I promise." Severide nodded.

The tears were falling thick and fast.

"Ok, I'm ready." He was glad he wasn't alone.


	36. Stay Calm

The pain he was in was almost unbearable, it would have been unbearable if he weren't so worried about Severide, he kept asking about him, he couldn't see him anymore, they were in separate ambulances but that didn't stop him from crying out for him.

"Sev…"

He was no longer in the ambulance, there were no loud sirens but there was an amazing buzz around him, everyone was moving so fast, or maybe he was moving fast, everything seemed to be happening without him.

"Kelly…."

The paramedics were calling out details to the ER doctors but he heard none of it. His eyes were frantically searching around. He couldn't move. There were shots of agony up and down his body. His head felt like it was going to explode. There was a copper taste in his mouth.

"Kel…"

He didn't know where Severide was, he called out his name but there was something muffling his voice. He continued frantically searching around despite his blurry vision. There was a thick warm trickle of blood over one eye. Finally. He spotted Severide from the very corner of his left eye. He called out for him.

"Sev…" He tried to twist and turn. Severide was surrounded by ER staff. He continued to twist and struggle. Why wasn't Severide saying anything? Why weren't they telling him anything?

"Sir, I need you to stay calm. They're doing their best to make sure you friend is ok. Now, I need you to concentrate on me. Can you tell me your name?"

"Matt..." It was barely audible.

A light was tormenting him. "Do you remember what happened?"

He opened his mouth to reply but he had no answer.

"Matt, do you remember what happened?" The voice was insistent.

His vision was greying around the edges and suddenly there was a shrill beeping noise around him, his eyes rolled back and he knew no more as his body seized.


	37. Stop

"Casey stop!"

"Why?"

"Because... because I think I love you."


	38. Here For Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1.05 Hanging On

Casey was lying in pain waiting for his CT results, Hallie had left him, after all she was working and despite the pain he wasn't dying, he didn't notice Severide pop his head through the open door until he spoke.

"Hey Casey."

"Kel… Severide? What are doing here?"

"Hallie called," Severide supplied. Casey hadn't said a word to Hallie about their fragile friendship. It was during the month after Darden's death that he moved out of their apartment. He'd not said a word about the blame game that had been going on between them. Darden's death had torn their previously strong friendship apart.

"Oh."

"That looks nasty." Severide was staring at his chest.

He pulled the jumper, that had been lying on the bed next to him, up to cover the now dark bruises.

"You can't put your top on," Severide noted. "When did you last accept painkillers?"

He didn't reply.

"You had some when you got here? Been a long time since then. I'll be back."

Severide did come back and he was trailed by a nurse who handed Casey two pills and a cup of water.

"You can't give him anything stronger?" Severide asked.

"I'm fine," he replied stiffly. The nurse left. Severide sat down. "Why are you here?"

"You got dragged into an alley and beaten up."

"I know. I _was_ there. Why are you here?"

"Because you'd be here for me."


	39. Golf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 5.04 Nobody Else is Dying Today

"Hey." Casey greeted him with a smile, a tired smile Severide noted as he entered the apartment they used to share.

He glanced around. "No Dawson or kid?"

"At her brothers," Casey replied.

"How you doing?" he asked, a frowned played across his brows.

"Fine," Casey replied quickly.

"Fine?" he questioned.

"My chest is a little sore still," Casey admitted.

They sat down on the couch together; Casey put the game on the TV and passed Severide a beer.

"I have a question for you," he began with a small smirk, Casey glanced round to face him. "Since when have you liked golf so much?" he chuckled.

"I'm never going to enjoy golf," Casey muttered, "I'm never going to be any good at it either. I'd probably like it more if I was better at it..."

Severide laughed.

He shook his head. "Why do politicians always have to do stuff over golf or dinner?"

"Dinner?" Severide questioned.

"Tonight," he replied. "To meet some contractors that I was supposed to meet playing golf yesterday," he sighed and slumped back onto the couch.

Concerned Severide began, "Hey… are you ok?"

"Yeah," he nodded a spoke a little too enthusiastically. "It's just yesterday. Long day."

"Yeah, long day," Severide repeated with a thin smile, "I'm glad you're all right."

"It was a close one," he stated.

"Dawson should have realised something was up when you didn't pick Louie up," Severide said quietly, not wanting to offend.

"Nah," he shook his head, a smiled plastered across his tired features, "She probably thought I was playing golf."

Severide didn't say anymore, he didn't tell him that Dawson should know by now that he wouldn't say he'd do something and then not do it.


	40. What About You?

Severide's name appeared on Casey's phone as it rang, he'd rushed from one side of the kitchen to the other to pick it up before the ringing died. "Hey!" he spoke into the receiver breathlessly.

"Hey… you sound busy?"

"Bit of cleaning. You all right?"

"I can't just call?"

"Sorry, of course you can."

"You ok? You seem…"

"I'm fine."

"Ok… I just wondered if you wanted a guys night out later?"

"I can't, I've got Louie."

"Dawson busy?"

"She said she's going to Molly's."

"Working?"

"Erm I'm not sure… I think Brett asked her to go, something about her brother…"

"Case… if she's not working shouldn't she be with her kid?"

"It doesn't work like that, she needs time to herself."

"What about you?"

"Look, Sev I've got to go, Louie's just woken up."


	41. She Left Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Season 3 AU. Severide's breakup was in 3.11 Let Him Die rather than 3.09 Arrest in Transit.

After saying goodbye to Brittany at the train station he drove back home, he didn't go out drinking hoping to wake up and forget everything that had gone wrong in the world. He had taken the scenic route back, he wasn't in rush so he drove around for a while but when he got home he wished he hadn't. He unlocked the door and stepped inside.

"Casey?"

The place was a mess. It looked like they'd be robbed, ransacked. But the door had been locked, and from where he was standing he couldn't see any broken windows and the back door was shut.

"Casey? Dawson?"

He heard a noise. It came from Casey's bedroom. He walked carefully over the broken items on the floor, there were smashed picture frames, lamps were scattered, a few glasses, books, furnishings and other items had been strewn across the apartment. He stepped cautiously into Casey's bedroom.

"What the hell… Casey? Case? Buddy?"

But Casey didn't acknowledge him, didn't even hear him. He took one last swipe at the shelving unit sending everything smashing and crashing down around him before he stepped back, his chest was heaving, his shirt was slick with sweat, he was breathing heavily and…

"Oh God… Matt look at me… Matty… Matt!"

Startled at Severide's presence Casey took another step back and would have fallen back onto the bed if it weren't for Severide's quick reaction.

"Kelly?" His arms were being gripped tightly.

"What..." Severide trailed off when he noticed the amount of blood on the floor, he'd only just seen Casey's bloody arm, whatever he had done had caused it to bleed profusely. "Let's sit down."

Casey was still breathing heavily and he had an alarmed panicked look in his eyes, Severide was sure that if he weren't holding him he'd run or at the very least back away from him.

"Let go of me!" Casey struggled, Severide had thought too soon; he was trying to get away.

"Casey! Casey look at me! Casey! Casey look!"

Casey's frantic movements stopped.

"Are you ok? What happened? You did this?"

The physical pain Casey felt finally registered, he almost whimpered under Severide's grip.

Severide lift his arm slightly and loosened his grip. "Erm… Don't move, ok?"

Casey let both his arms fall down to his lap as Severide left him.

He grabbed the first aid kit from the bathroom and as he took a towel from the kitchen he noticed the empty whiskey bottle on the side.

He rushed back into the bedroom and quickly grabbed Casey's arm again, lifting it above heart level before towelling away the blood, the wound was deep, it was still bleeding heavily, he wrapped the towel around the arm and pressed down tightly.

"Argh…"

"It's all right, you'll be ok," Severide reassured him, partly because he didn't really know what to say, his friend had been so angry he'd wrecked the entire apartment, hurting himself in the process. "What have you put a hole in?" he questioned, his tone much more jovial than he felt.

"Sorry..."

A few moments later Severide carefully rolled the towel back. "Damnit… Case you need stitches…"

"No," Casey stated suddenly at the implication.

"It's all right… If you don't start dying on me I'll drive us a bit further, we'll go to a different hospital."

Four hours and thirteen stitches later Severide drove Casey back home. They were both exhausted, Severide was using all of his energy concentrating on driving.

They pulled up outside the apartment. The sun was starting to rise.

"She left me," Casey admitted, his voice a lot stronger than he felt.

Glad of Casey's admission Severide nodded but said no more, he knew Casey well enough not to drag it out, not to ask questions, not to dig, so instead he stated, "I left Brittany."  
  
That got Casey's attention, he turned and frowned, his tired features adorned with concern.  
  
"We're good. She's happy, I'm happy. I'm good."

"Good then… I guess." The frown still remained.

"I'm not lying… I am ok with this. I haven't felt ok for a long time but…"

"I _am_ ok… I'll be fine when I wake up."

"Yeah I know, that's what worries me."


	42. Everything's Fine

Casey opened the apartment door to a very enthusiastic Severide. "Hey, you ready?"

"Ready?" he frowned.

"The game..." Severide held up two tickets.

"Oh... right... erm..."

"What happened to your face?"

Casey brought a hand up to the darkening bruise on his temple. "Oh that... just an accident."

"An accident?"

"Look, Severide I can't go today, I..."

"Case... you've been looking forward to this for over a month."

"I know. I'm sorry... I'm just busy, I forgot about it," he reeled off excuses.

"Are things ok with you and Daw..."

"Everything's fine," he said hurriedly. "I'll see you next shift."

Casey shut the door before Severide could say anything more.


	43. Struggling

Casey entered the apartment quickly, almost threw his coat onto the rack, chucked his keys down on the side table and hurriedly made his way to his room.

Severide stopped his best friend and roommate before he could disappear. "Are you ok?"

"Fine." Casey smiled forcefully, there seemed to be few people in this world who saw the strain on his face as he did, Hallie had noticed, but she'd been gone for nearly two years now. "I'm in a rush, only here to get changed, I forgot…"

"You're struggling again."

"Severide…"

"I found these." He placed the white unopened pot of pills on the coffee table. "Maybe they would help if you actually had them."

Casey continued to stare at the white pot on the table.

"I wasn't looking," he stated, for some reason he thought it was important to tell Casey that.

"I don't need them."

Severide picked up the pot. "They are prescribed to you."

He let out a long sigh before admitting, "Boden… Boden asked me to see a shrink."

"Asked you?"

"He said he wasn't happy with me being on the job with my head where it is right now." His brows furrowed. "Bit hypocritical considering he let you work whilst… Sorry."

Severide shrugged the comment off. "So, where is your head at right now?"

"My head's fine. I was just tired."

"Right… That's why the doctor you saw prescribed these. For tiredness," Severide replied incredulously.

"We've just had some bad calls recently," he stated.

"And your fiancée left you and… hmm… let me think… what other shit has happened to you… oh yeah… your…"

"Kelly, I don't need you to list everything that…"

"Case, what I'm trying to say is that it's understandable that you're struggling, and I'm here if you wanna talk, get some boxing gloves on, drink the night away or whatever it is you need."


	44. The Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

Severide found the note the day after he found Casey's body.  
  
_'I'm sorry. I did everything wrong. I can't keep hurting everyone around me. I can't keep hurting myself. I'm sorry. Please don't do something rash. I'm sorry. I'm done. You couldn't have saved me and I'm sorry.'_


	45. Trapped

"Sev! Speak to me!"

Casey clambered through the rubble. Sharp pains were shooting up his left leg as he did.

"Sev!"

Casey wheezed, spluttered and coughed. There was dust in his mouth, in his eyes.

"Sev! Come on!"

And then he heard it. A PASS alarm blaring.

After following the sharp tone Casey eventually spotted Severide in the darkness, his light was reflected by the turnout coat.

"Kelly?" He was half buried by rubble.

Severide groaned.

"Kelly?" he questioned again, he started frantically moving the smaller pieces of rubble off Severide's body.

"Case…" Severide muttered as he opened his eyes and slowly became aware of his surroundings.

"Propane tank blew… I think I pushed Herrmann into the stairway… I don't know if he's…"

"Radios…"

"Only static. How badly are you hurt?"

"My head feels like it's had a sledgehammer whacked into it…"

"Can you move? Feel everything?" He tried moving a larger slab from across the back of Severide's legs.

"I'm all right Case, it's just my head."

"You have half a building on top of you."

"Are you hurt? You're coughing a lot…"

"It's just the air."

"Are you hurt?"

"Yes."

"How bad?"

Casey looked down at his leg and grimaced. "I'm all right at the moment but I don't see a way out of here and the smoke is getting… Damnit! I can't move this!"

"Stop for a moment. Come here."

Eventually Casey moved up towards Severide so he could now see him.

"Take a few Matty. This is gonna be a waiting game. Nothing you can do."

"There's always…"

"We're trapped. They will come in and get us."


	46. Magic

"Good morning."

"It is a _good_ morning, isn't it?"

"Oh."

"Don't worry, I'll work my magic."


	47. Contagious

"What are you doing here?" Casey opened the front door, he was pale and trembling with the effort of getting up from the couch.

"Boden sent you home sick yesterday," Severide replied.

"Yeah... So, what are you doing here?" he repeated. "I'm probably contagious."

"I'm here to play nurse." Severide smiled.

But Casey wasn't letting him past the threshold. "I'm probably contagious," he said again.

"I'm willing to take that risk."


	48. Trembling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1.22 Leaders Lead

Casey's shuddering intakes of breath slowed. He pulled back from Severide's strong grip. The others were still stood at the end of the corridor but Casey was completely unaware of their presence.

Severide loosened his hold on Casey when he felt him pull back but he didn't let go, he wouldn't let go of him.

"Can I see her?" Casey's voice was strained, tight, quiet. His eyes were red rimmed, blotchy, tear stricken.

Severide stood back, stayed by the door, when they were allowed to see Hallie's body.

Casey took several slow steps towards the bed where Hallie lay under a white sheet. Pristine compared to her skin. He stopped before he reached her. He'd seen dead bodies before. He'd seen flesh melted off so badly it just fell from the body. He'd seen bodies unrecognisable having been torn apart by machinery.

Severide watched as Casey stood stock still, he'd not reached Hallie's side. "Matt?" – are you ok?

"I can't…" Casey's voice was almost inaudible. "This isn't real. It can't be."

Severide quietly reached his side, he thought he'd been stood still but now he was next to Casey he could see him trembling.

Casey took a breath and moved to Hallie's side. He caressed her face, her hair, leant down and whispered 'I love you's' and apologies.

Severide said nothing. He waited. Waited for Casey to say his goodbye's. He kept the nurse out of the room. Kept the porter out of the room. He waited until Casey was ready to leave.


	49. Warm

The blizzard was attacking Chicago with all it's might. Severide could see the thick flakes of snow hitting the windows in the common room as he alone stood in the warmth waiting for the coffee pot to ping. If Casey were there he'd give him a disapproving look - are you really gonna have coffee at this time? - but Casey was just as bad, if not worse with his caffeine habits. Severide didn't know why he was still awake, and it wasn't because he'd drank loads of coffee, he was fairly certain he was now immune to its effects. It was nearing 1am and Truck 81 were still out at a call they'd gotten four hours ago. He wasn't worried, that was no time at all, but he couldn't help but feel for Casey, the man liked his bed, liked his sleep, and hated the cold.

Finally, after half an hour had passed and Severide's coffee mug was once again empty, he heard Casey and his crew arrive back. Most went to the bunk room but he heard a familiar set of footsteps enter the common room. He turned around and smiled. "What time do you call this?" he teased.

Casey ignored him. "Please tell me the hot water's fixed?" There had been a maintenance crew at the firehouse earlier, they'd accidentally hit a pipe.

Severide shook his head apologetically.

"I can't feel anything."

Severide smiled at Casey's almost whiney expression. He didn't miss the boyish pout as he sank down onto the couch. He quickly glanced around the room, it was empty. "C'mere, I'll keep you warm."

Casey, ever so conscious of everyone's opinion of him, didn't move up to Severide.

"It's me or hot soup."

"Don't want soup."

"Get over here then."

Severide switched the TV on, Animal Planet, and muted the volume, he didn't want to disturb anyone, didn't need to draw attention to the two lieutenants sat alone in the common room. Severide wrapped his arm around Casey's cold body and he soon saw him dose off, Severide was paying no attention to the TV, instead he watched Casey, stared down at his slightly parted lips, an annoying stray wisp of blond hair that had fallen across his forehead, watched the way his chest fell up and down as he breathed ever so softly in his arms.

 


	50. Too Much

Severide had shot up from the squad table and followed Casey as he jumped out the rig. Something was wrong.

Casey sped into his quarters and shut the door. Thankfully the blinds were still drawn because of the early hour of the call.

Severide entered without a word.

Casey was facing away. "Sometimes it's all too much, you know?"

Severide nodded. "I know."


	51. Thud

"Case?"

"Huh?"

"You gonna finish that?"

"Oh. No."

"Can I have it?"

"What?"

"Case?"

"Sorry... don't feel so good."

"Matthew Casey admitting that he doesn't feel so good. That's a first."

"Sorry..."

"Don't move. I'll get you another glass of water... and a basin... you look like you're gonna hurl."

*Thud*

"Damnit Casey. I said don't move."


	52. Almost There

"Casey!?" Severide called out through the roar of the fire. The building seemed to be crashing down around them. He could hear Casey's PASS alarm blaring. It felt like an age until he reached the truck lieutenants still form, he shifted the debris. There was a gash on Casey's leg.

The resounding alarm faded. "Sev?"

"Can you stand?"

"Uh huh…"

"Woah bud… I got you."

"Sev?"

"Come on. Don't pass out on me, we're almost there."


	53. Yes or No

"Matt, can you hear me?" Severide's green eyes bore into his.

The world was spinning.

Everything was a haze.

He couldn't feel anything.

"Don't try to talk." Severide shook his head at his garbled attempt. "There's a tube in your throat."

His eyes searched around but he saw nothing.

"Blink once for yes and twice for no, ok?"

Blink.

"Do you remember what happened?"

He couldn't remember anything.

He didn't know where he was.

Blink blink.

Now he noticed Severide's eyes were not only full of concern, they were on the brink of crying.

Again.

Again because he could see there were tracks in the grime and dirt on Severide's face.

"A gas tank blew. The ceiling caved in and…" Severide looked away.

He tried to talk, tried to ask what was wrong but he couldn't.

"Do you remember?" Severide asked again because he didn't want to remind him, didn't want to be the one to tell him.

There were flashes of images. Flashes of pain. Flashes of tears. Flashes of fear.

Oh God.

Blink.

"You do remember," Severide stated.

Blink.

A tear escaped and trailed down his own dirt covered face.

"They weren't going to wake you." Severide was forceful with his words, as if he was struggling to speak. "But you have a choice and they will make it for you if don't."

He didn't who they were.

Severide took a deep breath. "Both your legs were crushed. They can… they can try and repair them both but… but…"

He stared up at him.

"… But the damage is… is significant. The chance of… the likelihood that you'll develop an infection… that the stress of the…" Severide swallowed. "They want to amputate your right leg."

Oh God.

"You'll never regain full function of it if they try to save it… Matt… Matty, if they try to save it your survival chance decreases but… but I want you to choose… I wanted you to know before they…"

Oh God.

"I… I think you should let them amputate," Severide stated, "And I want you to know whatever you decide I'll be here with you, I'll support your decision. I'm not going to leave you."

Oh God.

"Yes or no, Matt?"

Blink.

Severide let out a sigh of relief. "Ok." He looked away for a moment. "They're gonna put you under again. I'll be right here when you wake up. I promise. I love you Matt, I love you…"

 


	54. I Got You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) “I got you. It’s gonna be ok, you’re going to be ok.”

Severide watched as Casey walked up to the doctor.

He watched as Casey broke down in his arms.

He heard Casey’s heart wrenching cry.

He pushed past the others.

He took the doctors place.

He held Casey tightly as his body was wrecked with sobs.

“I got you. It’s gonna be ok, you’re going to be ok.”


	55. Miles Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) “I feel like everyone’s miles away from me.”

"Hey…" Casey knocked on the open door to Severide's quarters and stepped inside. "You never showed up last night?"

"Yeah, should have messaged you…" he muttered, his back to Casey.

"Or just answered the phone one of the three times I rang you." Casey shrugged.

He turned around on his chair. "Did you guys have a good time?"

"Would have been better with you," Casey replied.

"Nah…"

"What's up with you?" Casey quizzed.

"It's nothing," he dismissed.

"Clearly it isn't nothing. Talk to me," Casey urged.

"You and Hallie are engaged now and that's great, Andy now has another kid… I just…" he sighed, "… I feel like everyone's miles away from me…"

"Kelly…"

"You guys are settling down and I'm… I'm just… not…"

Casey sat down on the bed. "Just because it didn't work out with Renee, doesn't mean it's never gonna work out for you, and don't look at me and Hallie as example… I mean, we've been going out for years and only just got engaged because…"

"Because you're a wuss and it took you years to give her a ring," he mocked. His laughter died away as he stated, "Don't want to end up like my dad…"

"Me neither…" Casey said darkly, thinking of his own. "You won't end up like your dad, it'll work out Kelly," he smiled and added, "How about a guys night out? No fiancées or wives involved."

"Sounds good."


	56. Dark Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 4.01 Let It Burn. Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "My mind is a dark place. You don't want to be there."

Severide entered the apartment and set his keys down on the side table, he switched the lights on and spotted Casey sat on the couch as he walked further into the open plan area. "Resorting to drinking alone in the apartment?"

"You drink alone in the apartment," he replied huskily.

"Not in the dark," Severide stated.

Casey placed his glass down on the coffee table. "I killed him."

"What?" Severide frowned as he sat down. "Who?"

"I hit him on the head with a hammer three times. I killed a man."

"Case..."

"He killed Katya without a second thought. I... I didn't hesitate. I'm as bad as he is... was..."

"Matt, it was self-defence."

"You weren't there."

"No. But I know you. If you had another option you'd have taken it. Wanna talk me through what happened? Wanna talk about it at all? You're worse than me on the talking about your feelings thing but I..."

"Look my mind is a dark place right now... you don't want to be there."

"I do. Grab your jacket," Severide stood up.

"What?"

"We're going out," he explained, "We'll grab a few beers, talk if you want, you just need to get out of this apartment."


	57. Stay Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) “I know this hurts, but you have to stay awake.”

"I know this hurts, but you have to stay awake!"

Casey bit his lip, drawing blood, but he nodded.

"Good Matt, we'll have you out of here in no time," Severide reassured him with a smile but his eyes lingered on the blood smeared on the ground beneath Casey's head. And his thoughts turned to a conversation they'd had only weeks ago where Casey had admitted his doctors warning; another blow to the head could kill him.

Casey was fading fast. His whole left side was being crushed by what felt like an entire building.

"Capp, Tony," Severide began, "On three!"

Casey let out and agonising scream as the large slab of concrete was lifted off him. He cried out as Severide pulled him away and flinched when the concrete was dropped back onto the ground.

"I got you," Severide said breathlessly, "You feel everything?"

"Yeah…" he muttered. "Just hurts."

"You did good, Matty." Severide smiled down at him. "You just gotta stay awake a little longer, ok? Let's get you out of here."


	58. Please

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Don't close your eyes, please don't close your eyes!"

"Well, here's to you Severide!" Herrmann cheered from behind the bar.

They all raised a glass.

Severide looked over to Casey and made his way through the crowd to him.

"You did good Kelly, that kids got his life back because of you." He smiled, that perfect dimpled smile that Severide loved so much.

"Nah, saving kids from gangs is just every day work." Severide grinned. He lowered his voice, "You know I'm not big on celebrations, so how about we take these celebrations home?"

Severide watched as his tongue peaked out of his beautiful lips, Casey smiled.  "Let's get out of here."

They stepped outside the bar and walked side by side. "So, yours or mine?"

"Guess mine's closer," Severide replied.

"We could get a cab?"

"Nah, it's nice out… and I need to walk off that burger and fries." Severide laughed.

They were walking alongside each other, arm in arm, their steps were synchronised.

There was a loud screech and a bang.

Car tyres and a gunshot.

Casey felt a sharp pain in his arm, felt a heavy weight fall onto him, knocking him down onto the sidewalk.

"Oh God Matt…" Severide saw the blood sprayed on Casey's face. The blood on his arm.

"Kelly… stay still…"

"What?"

Casey pushed himself up off the ground as Severide moved up onto his elbows, looking down at his own chest, looking down to where Casey was looking, his eyes wide and terrified.  
  
"You're ok… you're ok…" Casey repeated, he urged Severide back down, he called for an ambulance but Severide was losing too much blood. It was pulsing out over Casey's hands. Spluttering out of his mouth.

"Matt…"

"Don't close your eyes, please don't close your eyes!"

"Matt…"


	59. Numb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "I just want to be numb, I don't want to feel anything."

How apt that it was raining on the day of Severide's funeral. It lashed down and soaked Casey to the bone. The others had long left. It was getting darker and darker. The grey clouds were turning black.

"This isn't real is it?" he questioned.

The rain water mixed with his tears and he fell to his knees in front of the freshly dug grave.

"I just want to be numb, I don't want to feel anything! I want it all to be over! I want to wake up from this nightmare because none of this can be real! It hurts too much!"

He felt a presence behind him.

Severide.

No.

Of course it wasn't.

"Come on Matt, you need to go home at least if you don't want to come to the wake." It was Boden's authoritative voice, come to rescue him from the deep depths of grief.

Casey didn't even turn to face him. He just stood up and walked over to their parked cars. He dug his keys out.

"Leave your truck, I'll get someone to pick it..."

"No."

"I'm not letting you drive."

He scoffed. "In case I decide to wrap it around a telephone pole?" Casey hadn't intended to say that aloud.

"Yes."

"I don't need your help. You didn't need to come."

"Because you're fine?" Boden anticipated Casey's standard response.

"I'm far from fine."

 


	60. Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompts (gliderofgold) "Please don't do this, please don't act like you care." "You're my friend of course I fucking care!"

Casey threw open his front door, he'd been half expecting this. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Come on Matt..." Severide tried. "Don't push me away."

He shook his head. "Please don't do this, please don't act like you care."

"You're my friend of course I fucking care!"

"You're not coming in."

"Matt..."

"You're not my friend."

Casey slammed the door shut.


	61. Leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "You don't care, nobody cares, just leave."

He found Casey in a bar a few blocks away. He sat down next to him, watched as he asked for another drink, Casey was either stubbornly ignoring him or he'd drank too much to notice. Severide couldn't bear the silence any longer. "I'm so sorry Casey."

"You don't care, nobody cares, just leave."

"Don't be an idiot Casey. Don't push everyone away. Don't push me away. I care and I'm right here."

"You'll leave. Like everyone else."

"You have lost so many people. We both have. But we have each other. And if I have any say in it we'll have each other for a very long time."

"Something will happen. It always does," Casey replied darkly.

"Maybe, but if you always think like that then..."

"I'll end up in a bar getting piss drunk on my own?" Casey joked lightly, nursing the glass in front of him.

"Yeah..."

Casey sighed heavily. "Just gets a bit too much sometimes."

"I know."

"This is a crap way to deal with it," he commented, "Doesn't even work."

"Stay at mine tonight. We'll take a cab to the funeral. Neither of us will be under the limit tomorrow."

Casey looked at him with his tired drunk eyes. "Thanks Kelly."


	62. Don't Give Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "I can't give up on you, so please don't give up on yourself."

"I can't give up on you, so please don't give up on yourself," Severide almost pleaded.

"I've not given up," Casey replied, half annoyed that Severide had walked in on him, half grateful.

"Look around you!" he exclaimed, "Look at this place!"

Angry now at the accusation Casey yelled, "My fiancée died! Hallie died..." He trailed off and the tears that had been threatening to fall since Severide walked through his front door trickled down.

"I know." Severide walked up to him and put his arms around Casey's trembling form. "It's going to be ok," he spoke. "It'll always hurt but the pain will lessen. I promise Matt."


	63. Hating Myself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "I love you so much, I forgot what hating myself felt like."

"Casey... Matty... please stop... don't go," Severide pleaded. "I know there's nothing I can do or say that'll make you forgive me, if I could go back and..."

Casey turned around and faced him. "You can't go back Kelly."

"I know... I know... and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"So you've said a hundred times already."

"What can I do? I'll do anything."

"You know I love you... I love you so much, I forgot what hating myself felt like because of you..."

"Matt..." Severide began.

"No listen to me. I naively thought you'd changed, I really should know by now that people don't change... I thought you loved me, I gave you everything..."

"Matty I'm..."

"Don't call me that."


	64. I Fucked Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "I fucked up, why do you not care?"

"I fucked up, why do you not care?" Severide questioned.

"You feel guilty enough without me loading it on you," Casey replied simply.

"You should hate me," he insisted.

"I love you Kelly Severide, I don't care that you burnt the turkey. We'll just heat up some leftovers. I'm just glad we're spending Thanksgiving together."


	65. I Can't Walk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "I can't walk, just go on without me."

"Severide?!" Casey called out as the debris settled from the gas explosion. "Kelly?" He could hear a PASS alarm blaring through the roar of the flames.

 _"Casey, Severide?"_ Boden's voice came through the radio.

"I don't have eyes on Severide, he's down," Casey replied immediately, "Structures unstable."

 _"Can you get out?"_ Boden called back.

"Once I've found Severide I will," he finished.

 _"You've not got long,"_ Boden warned him.

Casey called out for Severide once again only this time he heard him call back.  
  
"Casey?"

"I'm coming to you." Casey shifted the fallen debris from around him and groped along the floor, the PASS alarm getting louder and louder as he got closer to Severide.

"I'm stuck..." Severide groaned as he reached him.

"You won't be for long..." Casey leveraged his halligan under the beam that was trapping Severide's leg, and with a grunt he managed to lift it enough for Severide to slide out. Casey let go and the beam fell down with an almighty crash.

The flames were getting hotter and hotter. Casey put his mask back on.

"You ok?" he questioned loudly through the noise of the fire as he looked Severide over. "Can you walk?"

Severide pulled himself upright with Casey's help, but the cry of pain that shot out of his mouth was enough to make Casey's heart leap.

"Kelly..."

"Put me down," Severide ordered. "My leg is broken I can't..."

"Come on..." Casey slipped his arm back under Severide's shoulder and pulled him to his side.

"I can't walk, just go on without me," Severide insisted, coughing through the thick smoke.

Casey put Severide's mask back on and practically flung him over his shoulders. He kicked away another fallen beam and made his way to the exit. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears. So loud he thought it might explode. He had to get Severide out of there. He saw the light of the exit through the smoke and collapsed through the open door as flames shot out behind them.

Severide was taken off him and to the waiting ambulance.

Shay shouted back towards him. "You hurt Casey?"

"Just need to catch my breath... m'all right..." he coughed out from his position on his knees.

Boden hauled him up, he took off his bunker gear and was passed a bottle of water. He showered himself in the cool liquid before making his way over to the back of the ambulance.

Severide gritted his teeth and pushed himself up off the gurney so he could catch a glimpse of his truck counterpart. "You're an idiot Casey. Should have left..."

"Shut up Kelly. You know I pull people out of burning buildings for a living, right?" he grinned.

"I didn't think you'd make it..." Severide fell back onto the gurney, too tired and in too much pain.

"I always make it," Casey smiled, "See ya at the hospital."

Casey watched as the ambulance left. He walked over to his truck, took off his helmet and leant heavily on the helm. That had been far too close for comfort. He'd nearly lost Severide.

His private moment was interrupted by Herrmann. "All right lieutenant?"

"Close one," he muttered before walking away to get started on the overhaul now he could see the engine crew leaving the building.


	66. Take It Easy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "You have broken ribs, take it easy."

"You have broken ribs, take it easy," Severide urged as Casey got into the car. He fastened his seatbelt and pulled away from the sidewalk. Casey had barely said a word since he'd met him in the ER. "So... what happened? You've got a nice shiner going on..."

"Nothing." Casey dismissed him.

"Cops dropped you off at the hospital," he said as if Casey needed reminding.

"Look, can you drop it? Please." Casey sighed and turned his head to look out into the street through the passenger side window. "I didn't know who else to call at this hour..."

"Could have got a cab," he commented.

"I can get out and get a..."

"We're already on our way back," he stated.

There was silence and a few concerned glances from Severide to the blond in his passenger seat for the rest of the short journey.

"I got in a bar fight," Casey announced as Severide pulled up outside his apartment block.

"Could have guessed that," he grinned, "What exactly..."

"Kelly stop," Casey insisted, "I'm not proud of it."

"Cops didn't arrest you... they took you to the hospital..." he thought aloud.

"They arrested the other guy," Casey replied, "I was only trying to help..."

"The other guy look worse than you then?"

Casey glanced down at his bruised hands. "Yeah..."

"Sounds like you did someone a favour... damsel in distress maybe?" Severide smiled.

But Casey just shook his head. "I just got angry and... and lost control..."

Severide had known Casey long enough to know, although not necessarily understand, his issues. "No, you were just helping someone."


	67. CPR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "I don't know how to do CPR."

"I don't know how to do CPR..." Severide stated down the phone.

"What? Of course you do," Casey replied hurriedly.

"Casey, it's a goldfish..."

"Surely the principle is the same..."

"Look, I'm fairly sure it's been dead for a while... it's floating..."

"How long were you out?" Casey questioned.

"I only went to the gym..."

"Well, try something," he insisted, "It might still be alive..."

"Casey it's dead," Severide said firmly.

"It can't be dead..." he sighed audibly into the receiver. "We're supposed to be looking after it... Violet will be back from her holiday tomorrow... it can't be dead."

"Well, I'm looking at it right now Matt. It's definitely dead."

"Damnit..." he muttered.

"I'll send you a picture of it," Severide told him, "Go to the pet store on the way home, there's bound to be a very similar looking goldfish, right?"

"Right..." he was unconvinced.

"She'll never notice," Severide replied, "And pick up a bottle of wine on your way back too... gonna deserve it after disposing of this dead fish for you..."


	68. Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Whose blood is that?"

The scene was a mess.

Shots were fired everywhere.

They were firefighters not cops. They weren't prepared to be in the middle of a turf war.

Severide saw Casey go down, he'd covered someone. Sometimes he wished he wasn't so damn selfless.

The rain of bullets stopped.

Severide saw Casey get up, check his crew and begin to help the victims into the awaiting ambulances as Severide jumped out of his rig.

Eventually everyone had been seen to and the debris from the MVA, the original reason for their presence, was being cleaned away.

Casey stepped away from the last victim who was being wheeled away.

Severide walked up to him, his eyes on Casey's chest. "Whose blood is that?"

"It's not mine," Casey replied almost immediately.

"You're looking awfully pale for a man who says he's not lost any blood."

"It's not..." Casey looked down at the spreading blood on his turnout coat. "Oh..." That was when the pain hit him. He thought he'd just pulled something when he'd pushed that woman to the ground when he heard the gunshots.

"Oh?" Severide's worried quadrupled.

"I've been shot..." he collapsed into Severide's arms.

"I need a medic!" Severide yelled out as he gently lay Casey down on the ground.

Everything slowed down. The paramedics came over carrying a back board and a jump bag. Casey's turnout coat was opened, his tops were cut for access. Severide's eyes remained on Casey's closed ones and his hand slipped into Casey's limp one as the paramedics assessed the injury and prepped him for transport.

Casey's eyes fluttered open as he was pushed into the ambulance. "Can I make a request?" he slurred.

"You're going straight to the ER Matt," Severide stated.

"I know, I know... but can we have bullet proof turnout coats..."

"You definitely need one," Severide muttered and with a nod from Boden he jumped into the back of the ambulance.


	69. Pressure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Apply pressure to the wound, don't let go." "Don't you dare fucking let go!"

Severide was trapped, he had eyes on Casey and the victim they'd been trying to get out of the factory building before the gas tank exploded. The pain in his leg was shooting agony around his body. He couldn't move. He was straining to see Casey through the rubble and debris. He'd tried his radio but could only hear static.

The victim was panicking.

Casey was still unconscious.

"Are you hurt? Is Casey breathing?" Severide called out.

"I'm ok. I don't know... yes… yes he's breathing… and he's bleeding... he's bleeding a lot..."

"You've got to wake him up, is he trapped?"

"No... he's still bleeding..."

"Apply pressure to the wound, don't let go," Severide commanded, straining against the fallen rubble trying to get free and get to Casey. "Try and wake him."

"I... I can't..."

"Do it! And don't you dare fucking let go!"

"I... I don't like blood... I can't..."

"Look, we're all afraid of something but you have to do this! You have to save his life!"

After a few seconds the man called back. "It's not stopping!"

"It will..." Severide replied, for his own sake as well. "Can you wake him up?"

"His eyes flickered opened..."

"Casey? Casey! Come on, buddy!" Severide tried.

"He's not waking up."

Severide tried to shift the rubble around him, he tried to free his leg but nothing would give. And then he heard it, it was weak but it was Casey's voice. "Sev..."

"Hey buddy! You gotta stay awake, ok? You've lost a lot of blood... and we need to wait for the others to find us, ok?"

"... All right..."

"Casey? Matt?" he called out when Casey fell silent.

"He's unconscious," the man informed him.

"Damnit..." Severide muttered. He took some deep breaths and gritted his teeth. "Three... two... one... ARGH!" He screamed as he pulled his leg free from the debris. His hands shook as he examined his bleeding limb. Quickly he unfastened his turnout coat, tore of the bottom of his shirt and wrapped it around his lower leg.

The victim was sitting next to Casey's still form, his hands were pressed tightly against the firefighters abdomen as he watched Severide pull himself through the gap in the rubble.

Severide pulled himself over to Casey. The blond was pale beneath the soot and grime that covered his face, the light from Severide's torch glistened on the red pool of blood by his fallen friend's side. "Matt?" His pulse was weak beneath Severide's bloody fingertips. "Keep pressure on that," Severide ordered the man as he moved over to the debris blocking their exit. Slowly and carefully he started to move the rubble but it didn't get him very far until he heard the distinct chatter of his own squad crew. "We're down here! We're down here!" Severide called out.

"Lieutenant?" It was Capp calling back.

"Casey's bleeding out!"

"We're working as fast as we can," Capp replied.

"I know…" he muttered, looking back over to Casey.

"Erm… he's waking up…" the man told him after a few moments.

Severide dropped the debris from his hand and quickly made his way over to Casey, he smiled when he saw his eyes open and focused. "Hey you, catching some shut eye?"

His brows creased. "We're trapped?"

Severide had barely heard his voice over the sound of the machinery. "We'll be out in no time, you just gotta stay with me."


	70. What Happened?

"Kelly! Phone's ringing," Shay informed him as he stepped out of the bathroom.

"Who is it?"

She shrugged. "Unknown number."

He took the phone from her and answered. "Kelly Severide."

"Lieutenant Severide it's Chicago Med, Matthew Casey's been in an accident, you're listed as his…"

"Is he ok? What the hell happened?"

"I'm afraid I can't answer that over the phone."

"Be there as soon as I can…" He put the phone down.

"What's wrong?" Shay asked him immediately.

"Matt's been in an accident… she couldn't say anything else…"

"Let's go." She grabbed her own phone. "I'll call the others on the way."

Severide and Shay arrived at the front desk in the ER. "Here for Matt Casey?" Severide questioned urgently.

The receptionist stood up as she replied, "I'll get the doctor."

"Can someone just tell me what's happened?" he exasperated.

"Kelly they're just following protocol," Shay reminded him.

"I know, I know… I just…"

A doctor had approached him. "Kelly Severide?"

"Yes," he replied quickly. "Where's Matt? How is he? What..."

"He was in a car accident, he's stable but we need to take him up to the OR as soon as possible for the best chance to repair the damage…"

"Damage to what?" he questioned before the doctor could finish.

"He has a spinal cord injury, there are three fragments of bone impinging on the spinal cord. He can't feel anything from the chest down but it should be reversible with surgery and rehab, I have the consent forms…"

"He's not conscious?" Severide questioned.

"According to the paramedics he was conscious at the scene…"

"Talking?"

"No," the doctor replied.

"He hit his head?"

"He has a concussion, there's no bleeding, minimal swelling, we do have his previous medical history, the neurosurgeon has seen his scans, he's not worried about any reoccurrence," the doctor explained.

"All right… let me sign those forms then…" He didn't read the forms, he scrawled down his name and passed them back to the doctor as he asked, "What happened? Was it an accident?" Severide may have joked often about Casey's driving but he was a good driver.

"All I know is that it was a head-on collision," the doctor nodded over to the end of the corridor. "Those cops came in with the other driver, they'll know more I should think."

"Can I see Matt?"

"He needs to be prepped for surgery right away, someone will keep you informed." And with that the doctor turned away.

Severide stood rooted to the spot as he muttered, "A spinal cord injury…"

"They'll fix it Kelly," Shay tried to reassure him, "You know how strong he is. He'll be all right."

Severide walked away from her and up to the two police officers. "It was a firefighter in the other car, my brother," he began, "The other driver?"

"Drunk," the officer replied.

Severide looked over to the ER beds, he could see one man cuffed to one of them. "Is that the guy?" He went to storm over to the man that had injured Casey but one of the officers stopped him, and Shay was by his side in an instant trying to calm him.

"Hey... hey... Kelly... that won't help..." Shay tried.

He turned around. "He's not even got a scratch on him..."

"Kelly come on... come on... let's go and sit down ok? The others are on their way. We just need positive thoughts for Matt right now."


	71. Did You Kill Them?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Are they dead? Did you kill them?

"Casey?" Severide called out as he ran up the staircase, taking two steps at a time, the stitches in his side pulled at his skin as he did. "Matt?"

He reached the apartment door, it was ajar, there was a smear of blood on the dull white frame.

Severide stepped inside. "Case..."

Casey turned around as Severide entered the apartment, had he followed him there? He should still be resting not chasing him around Chicago. "What are you doing?"

Severide was looking around the room they now stood. "Are they dead? Did you kill them?"

Casey looked down at the three dead bodies on the floor, a smile tugged at the corner of his lips. "Did I kill them?"

Severide shook his head. "Never seen you so angry..."

"PD's on their way," Casey commented. "They hurt you Kelly, but I'm not stupid enough to do this."


	72. Who?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Who the hell did this to you?"

Casey was late. He mumbled an apology as he limped past Boden.

No one seemed to notice the limp except for Severide. Or if they did they didn't give it much thought.

Severide wanted to walk straight up to Casey but he didn't, he restrained himself.

But less than thirty minutes later, when Casey hadn't reappeared from the locker room, Severide stormed in ready to question him because he'd been late for their last three shifts now and this time he was limping.

Severide had seen a lot in his lifetime, he wasn't easily shocked, but the sight he came across in the shower room made him stop in his tracks.

Casey stepped out from under the hot stream of water, expecting to find no one in the shower room since they'd not been out on a call yet.

He'd not expected to see Severide staring at him as he stood there with a towel wrapped loosely over his hips.

Severide's eyes mapped the bruises that patterned Casey's torso and arms. They were scattered in varying degrees of colour, some almost black. He took in the hand-shaped bruises on his arms. He saw the burn by his hip.

Casey slipped on his long sleeved polo as Severide continued to say nothing and when the other man didn't move out of his way he snapped. "What do you want?"

"Who the hell did this to you?"

"No one."

"Right... you fell down the stairs?"

Casey ignored him and continued to dress.

"Matt... please just tell me who?"

"Why? Because you care now?" Casey shook his head and spoke with spite.

"I'll kill whoever did this to..."

"Go to hell, Severide. Quit pretending you still care about me."

"I do care."

"Too late."


	73. Throwing Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Are you... throwing up in there?"

Severide was standing at the sink in the bathroom, he was focused on restyling his hair when he saw a blur of blond and grey dash into the one of the cubicles. He didn't think much of it until he heard the retching sounds.

"Matt? Are you..." He walked over to the cubicle door, "... throwing up in there?" Really it was obvious but it was a shock to the system to see Casey hungover at the start of shift. "Matt? ... You all right in there?"

Suddenly the door burst open and Casey stumbled through, he rushed over to the sink and quickly splashed cold water on his face in an attempt to slow his racing heart.

"Casey?"

"What?" Casey snapped. "Never seen someone with a hangover?"

"Never seen you with a hangover at work..." he commented carefully.

Casey shook his head, he looked like he was about to say something but then he averted his eyes and glanced down at the floor.

"Look, Matt if you need to talk about..."

"I'm fine," Casey stated firmly.

"It's only been a week since Hallie..."

"Quit reminding me."


	74. Eating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (gliderofgold) "Why aren't you eating?"

Casey's attention was pulled from the paperwork at his desk to Severide when he knocked at his door.

Severide didn't wait for permission once he had Casey's attention. He opened the door and sauntered in. He sat down on the bed.

Casey went back to his paperwork but he couldn't concentrate any longer. "What do you want?" he questioned, his back to Severide but the man didn't reply. "Kelly?" This time he turned around to face him.

"Why aren't you eating?"

"In case you didn't notice, I have a pile of paperwork on my desk that needs doing." He moved slightly in order to show his desk.

"So do I."

"Yet you're sitting in here."

"Yet... I had lunch."

"What is this Severide? Twenty questions?"

"Pretty sure I only asked you one question... and you didn't answer it."

"Look I..."

Severide stood up. "I'll let you get on with your paperwork but don't punish yourself for that kids death, all right? We just weren't there in time. Not everyone can be saved."


	75. Teddy Bear

"What?" Severide groaned as he woke up.

"Nothing."

"Why are you staring at me?"

"I like watching you sleep," Casey admitted with a small smile.

"Well, that's not weird at all..."

"You're all hard and tough but really I know you're just a big teddy bear."

"Yeah? Was I a big teddy bear last night?"

"No, last night you were..." Casey grinned. "You were just hard," he laughed.

"I'm not a teddy bear..."

"You are when you sleep, when you wrap your arms around me and hold me, when you think no one's looking, when..."

"You've been looking, haven't you?"

"Can't help it."

"Me neither. Have to fight every urge not to walk up and touch you."

"Well, we can make up for that now. Got twenty minutes before we have to leave."


	76. How Long?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (words-amid-stars) "How long has it been since you've slept?"

"How is he?" Shay questioned as she entered the hospital room.

"No change," Casey replied, his eyes didn't leave Severide's bruised and scratched face.

"The doctor was positive yesterday," Shay stated.

"Yeah... he's still not woken up though... why isn't he waking up?"

"Matt, it's not even been forty-eight hours yet, they said it could take a few days for the bleed to resolve, that he may not wake up properly until after that's happened," Shay reminded him, and herself, they'd all been worried when Casey had pulled Severide's unconscious and battered body out of the burning building.

"Yeah, I know, I know," he nodded.

"How long has it been since you've slept?" Shay asked, concern evident as she glanced across at his pale complexion, unwashed hair and red rimmed eyes.

"I've been home," he responded. He'd not managed to bribe his way into staying past visiting hours.

"That's not what I asked."

"I'm fine. I'm not the one in a hospital bed."


	77. Unknown Number

Severide was woken with the vibration of his phone sounding against the metal bedside table.

It was an unknown number.

"Hello?" he croaked into the phone as he accepted the call.

"Hey Severide… It's Casey…" Severide had recognised his voice immediately. "Are you busy?" Casey asked.

Severide glared at his digital clock waiting for his eyes to focus on the time. "Matt, it's 4am… What's wrong?"

"I'm at the hospital."

"Are you hurt?"

"I'm fine… I kinda need a ride though…"

"What hospital?"

"Lakeshore. In the ER."

"Be there in twenty."

Severide was directed to a small curtained off are when he arrived in the ER and asked for Casey. He pulled back the curtain and didn't hide his shock at Casey's appearance. His right eye was bruised and swollen closed, there was a small gash above the eyebrow, knitted together neatly with a few stitches, there were bruises on his arms and a brace on his left wrist.

"You're fine?" he questioned incredulously. "Thought you weren't the one that was hurt?"

Casey shrugged and bit back a wince. "No one else here."

"What the hell happened?"

"I just fell."

"Right…" he deadpanned. "You're gonna have to come up with something more believable than that… where's that guy you're seeing?"

"I fell down the stairs, Severide. I didn't just slip over."

"Why'd do you call me and not that guy your…"

"Look, if you're just gonna…"

"Stop, Matty, let's…"

"Don't call me that," Casey snapped.

"… Just start a again, ok? I'm here and I want to give you a lift home."

"I am sorry I called you… didn't know who else to call, got no money on me, not even got my phone or my ke…"

"You've not got your keys?" Severide questioned quickly. "What's happened tonight?"

"Can I, maybe, crash at yours tonight… or do you have that spare key still?"

"You can crash at mine," Severide replied, he did still have the key to Casey's place but he didn't want him going there, he wanted him under his own roof, under his protection, maybe he could even get him to talk whilst he stayed.

"Thanks…" he mumbled.

"Are you free to go?"

"Think so." Casey nodded and he stood up from the bed. Now Severide suspected bruised ribs as well by the way Casey was clutching his chest.

"Oh, Matt…" a nurse had just rushed over them. "I really want you to take these and have a look at…"

"I've got to go…" Casey muttered as he walked away.

Severide held back and looked at the leaflets the nurse was holding. "I'll make sure he gets them…"

"Try and keep him out of here too, don't want to see him again this month," she smiled sadly.

"Again? This isn't the first time?" He couldn't hide the shock from his voice.  
  
She nodded.  
  
"Erm… thanks…" he said as he took the domestic violence leaflets and caught up with Casey.


	78. Medical Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from Stingray “You know, normal people listen to medical advice.”

"Casey's back," Herrmann commented as Severide walked by him in the locker room. "Thought he wasn't back 'til next shift?"

"You and me both…" Severide frowned, what the hell was Casey doing back already? He marched over to Casey's quarters, he didn't bother knocking when he saw his counterpart sat at his desk. "What are you doing?" he demanded.

"Drinking coffee…" Casey spoke slowly. "What's up with you?"

"With me? What are you doing here?"

"I was going stir crazy stuck in my house," Casey replied, and before Severide could say anything he added, "Boden's fine with me being back."

"Could come over to my place."

"Look, I'm…"

Severide cut him off. "You know, normal people listen to medical advice…" He cocked an eyebrow. "I was right next you when the doc said you should take a couple of shifts off."

"I'm good," Casey nodded. "I've taken worse hits."

Severide shook his head. "Stop being so careless with your life."

"What?" Casey stood up with a wince. "I'm not careless…"

"Just think about yourself for once, ok? Because… because you make me worry a lot more than I should."

"Then stop worrying."

"I care too much not to."


	79. It's Not Working

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: SELF HARM

Severide smiled when he saw the caller ID, he answered almost immediately. "Hey Case, you up for that night out then?"

There was just a muffled sound on the other end of the line.

"Matt?"

Nothing.

"Matt? You there?" Now he could hear the distinct sound of sobbing, it was getting louder and louder. "What's wrong? You gotta…"

"Kel..?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm here, I'm right here," Severide assured him as he picked up his car keys and locked up his apartment.

"I'm sorry…"

"Where are you, Matt?" He was taking two steps at a time down the stairs to the lobby.

"Bathroom."

"What's wrong? What's happened?" he questioned as he made his way quickly out of the apartment complex.

"I can't do it… I can't pretend anymore… I need help… I can't…"

"Matt, stay on the phone for me, ok? Stay on the phone and keep talking to me," Severide got into his car and put his cell in the hands-free set. "You still with me, Matty?"

"I'm here…" It was a whisper. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry… I shouldn't have…"

"I'm so glad, so happy, that you called me," Severide replied firmly, "Talk to me Matt. Tell me about your latest construction gig…"

Severide was still talking to Casey on the phone when he turned up at the house, he used the spare key he kept with his own to open up the door. The house was a mess but he didn't spend any time taking in the details, he just wanted, no, he just needed to get to Casey.

"Oh Matt…" he breathed as he gently opened the bathroom door.

Casey was sat on the tiled floor, there was blood seeping out of his hand, there were shards of mirror by his legs and blood smears on the tiles.

Severide dropped to his knees. "I'm here, I'm here, Matty…"

"Kel…"

Careful of the broken mirror he moved over to Casey. "C'mere…" he enveloped him into a hug and Casey broke down into tears once more.

"I'm not…good enough… I keep… failing everyone… can't do it anymore… I was trying so hard… and… and… it's not working… it's not working…" he spoke between sobs.

"Shh… just let me hold you." Severide's grip tightened as Casey's body shook beneath him. "I've got you, I've got you… shh… it's gonna be all right, I'm right here and I'm gonna help you… shh… I've got you…"


	80. I Want You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (bump-of-whump) "You still don't feel up to eating?"

Severide edged quietly into their bedroom, a plate of sandwiches in his right hand, a glass of juice in his left. "Thought you'd prefer lunch in bed." He smiled at Casey but his smile fell when he saw the plate of uneaten breakfast on the nightstand. "You still don't feel up to eating?"

"Not hungry," Casey replied, his eyes didn't leave the iPad that he held in his hands.

Severide didn't know what to say, he knew he couldn't force him to eat and Casey really did look rough. Maybe he was genuinely feeling unwell today because it didn't look like he'd even attempted to eat any of his breakfast. He walked over to the nightstand and put the glass of juice down, picked up the plate of breakfast food and promptly knocked over one of Casey's crutches, sending it flying into the wheelchair that sat in the corner of the room.   
  
"Made a mess of that, didn't I?" he said aloud, more to gain Casey's attention than anything else because he'd not even looked up at the sound of the crutch hitting the chair.

"They get in the way," Casey stated simply, still looking down.

Severide sighed and placed his hand on top of the iPad. "Matty, you really need eat something, I know all this is hard but…"

"This isn't because I lost my DAMN LEG!" Casey snapped, he almost slammed the cover down onto the iPad. "I'm – just – not – hungry."

"Fine," Severide surrendered with another heavy sigh, "But if you collapse during rehab later then…"

"I'm not going."

"What?" he was genuinely shocked. "Matt, you've been doing so well, you've been putting so much effort and you've improved so much, and you're only gonna get stronger." Severide put his hand on Casey's shoulder, squeezing it reassuringly.

"Oh yeah, I forgot my great achievement of the week – standing up for a grand total of six seconds…"

"Unassisted," Severide tried to remind him with a smile.

"Will you quit it?!" Casey snapped, knocking Severide's hand away with his arm.

"You can't push me away."

"What the hell are you talkin' about now?"

"You might as well get all the yelling and screaming over and done with, throw everything you've got at me because I ain't leaving you. You can't push me away. I'm here to…"

Severide was stopped mid-sentence by a fist.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Believe it or not – I am not going anywhere because I care about you."

"You can't leave me." Casey eyes dropped, his voice dropped as his rubbed his hand. "You can't leave me because of what everyone would say."

"What would everyone say?"

"You left me because I lost my leg."

"Matt, I'm not gonna leave you."

"No. You can't. You're stuck with me because of this."

"I have free will. If I wanted to leave I would… I mean, you've probably just given me a black eye but I'm not leaving. If you want me to step back a little I will but I genuinely want… I need to make you feel better and if that means I'm hassling you to eat then I am, but only because I care about you."

"I keep throwing up."

"I know," he nodded. Severide had heard him in the bathroom.

"Sorry…"

"I know you like your privacy, I know you don't like to be exposed when you're feeling rough, I understand how hard all this is, but I would prefer it if you spoke to me because maybe I can help." Severide placed a hand on the top of Casey's right thigh, just above the empty space under the bed covers where the rest of his leg should have been. "Because maybe I had a look at the painkillers and have seen that the side effects can be nausea and vomiting. So let's see if we can get some different ones, they might be better for you."

"I don't want them at all," Casey admitted.

"I get that, I really do but right now…"

"I need them because my left leg's a mess…" he half laughed. "They should have taken that one too."

"Matt stop, c'mere…" Severide moved in towards him.

"I don't need a hug," he snapped, just when Severide thought he'd managed to calm him. "I need…" but Casey trailed off.

"What do you need?"

"I… I… I don't know…" his voice cracked, "For this to have never happened? But I don't want to think like that… I don't want this to have changed me… but it has… I'm yelling at you and I'm hiding in this room and…"

"Shh… Matt." Severide smiled. "You've yelled at me plenty of times before all of this happened and you know what, this really is all a big change and you're gonna need more time to come to terms with it."

"I don't want to let it ruin my life… I don't want to become a bad person…"

Severide laughed and shook his head, "You could never be a bad person, Matt. Never."

"Everyone already sees me differently."

"Fuck everyone," Severide stated crassly, "Well… actually you're only allowed to do that with me but that's for a later date, right?"

"You still want me?"

"I'd want you if you two legs, four legs or one leg," Severide told him genuinely, "I want you."


	81. Migraines

Severide woke up in an empty bed, it was the second time this week, fifth time in the last month. He knew Casey wanted to be on his own, he'd requested it before, he knew he was most likely going to be turned away but nevertheless he pushed back the bed covers. He pulled his stiff legs out of bed, he really should have said no to that ridiculously long run Casey had persuaded him to join that evening, he much preferred weights in the gym to cardio outside. His bare feet hit the cold floor. He knew not to turn the light on and he knew their new apartment well enough by now that he could safely negotiate his way to the couch where he knew Casey would be sitting wide awake.

He could hear Casey's almost ragged breaths as he reached the couch. The man really needed some decent sleep.

"Matt?" Severide all but whispered.

Casey's breaths changed ever so slightly. He knew Severide was kneeling in front of him now.

"I'm going to get a fresh glass of water for you," Severide spoke gently, knowing how much a sharp or loud noise, even the soft noises he was making, would send spikes of agony through Casey's head. "How many painkillers have you had?"

Ever so quietly Casey replied, the vibrations of his own movements, his own voice, pained him. "Finished."

Severide froze. "Matt… that bottle must have been almost full?"

Casey's breaths increased a little. Severide knew he wasn't going to reply. He stood up and made his way to the kitchen area and switched on the under-cupboard lighting, it was soft and not too bright. He poured a fresh glass of water as silently as he could and glanced at the empty bottle of Advil that they'd only bought during last week's grocery shop. There'd been twenty-four pills in the bottle. Severide wouldn't buy any more than that at a time because of nights like this.

"Here." Severide brought the glass of water up to Casey's lips, not ice cold, not even very cold, because that would only worsen the pain in Casey's head.

After a few sips Casey whispered, "Thanks…"

"You need to try and get some sleep." Severide slipped an arm around Casey's waist ready to help him back to the bedroom.

"Can't move."

Severide moved and knelt back in front of him, eye level, although he couldn't see much of Casey's features in the dark. "This is getting ridiculous, Matt, you need to make an appointment."

"Doctor can't do anything."

"He can give you another codeine prescription… you're shaving years off your liver with all these and they're not even helping, are they?"

It had been a year since Casey injured his head, a year since a beam fell down on him and caused an epidural hematoma that had him fighting for his life for three days, that had him re-learning how to walk. But he'd done it. And he was back at work in six weeks. He wasn't himself but he had physically recovered, although he'd lied to his doctor and he'd lied to Severide before eventually admitting the truth several weeks after returning to work. The truth about his memory. And now a year later the effects of his head injury were still being seen – the migraines.

"Lie down here and I'll shut up, ok?" Severide soon felt Casey and he lifted his legs onto the couch, pulled a throw over his weary form and ever so gently massaged his head through his thick blond hair.

Casey's breaths soon relaxed and Severide smiled sadly down at him as he fell asleep.


	82. Nightmares Again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt (words-amid-stars) “I heard you scream. Nightmares again?”

There was a soft tap at his bedroom door.

He thought about remaining silent. Pretending to be asleep but his need for company won over. "Yeah?" his voice a little hoarse

The door opened and Severide entered a little cautiously. "I heard you scream. Nightmares again?"

"Sorry…"

"Told ya last night not to apologise. It's understandable, Casey."

He just shook his head miserably, looked down at the bed covers his hands gripped. And when he eventually looked up Severide was right by his side about to sit down on the edge of the bed.

"I've erm… I've got some sleeping pills…" Severide spoke carefully. "You could do with them… you really should get some decent sleep before tomorrow."

Tomorrow. Hallie's funeral.

"Nah," he forced a smile, "I'll be fine. I'll go back to sleep. Don't worry about me."

Reluctantly Severide sat back. "All right. Well, if you need anything I'm only upstairs."

"Thanks again for letting me stay."

"Wouldn't have it any other way." Severide leant over to turn off the lamp on the side.

"Don't," he warned him.

"I slept with the main light on after Andy… it helped. Don't need it now… you know it'll hurt less eventually," Severide nodded, stood up and left the room.

He looked over to the lamp. He'd not slept alone without the light on since Andy had died. And he'd had nightmares since he was sixteen. They weren't going to stop. He would have to thank Severide for everything after the funeral tomorrow and then go back home despite everything in his body telling him to stay.

 


	83. Sleeping

Casey had often found himself sitting in Bodens office with the man enquiring about his welfare over the years. 51 was really a family house compared to his previous.

"Are you sleeping?" the Chief asked him and Casey found himself struck dumb. There was no point in lying anymore. It was obvious. Boden continued, "When was the last time you got a decent nights sleep?"

He half laughed as he admitted the truth. "Can't even remember."

"Have you got some help? I'm more than happy to..."

"Help isn't helping."

"You'll come to me if you need anything?"

"Of course."

"I will send you home if I don't think..."

"I know, Chief. And I'm fine on calls. It's everything else." He's fine. Except he sees Kelly's face every time he sees a dead body. And he can't sleep because the bed is empty and his head is full of nightmares so bad that no one could even make them up.


	84. Two Choices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from the lovely Stingray “You have two choices” “Neither of which I like”

"Look Casey, you can talk to me or you can talk to that very nice nurse."

"I just want to go home."

"You have two choices."

"Neither of which I like… talking doesn't matter. I'm sure you already know what's going on…"

"I reckon I can hazard a pretty good guess."

"So it's none of your business then, I don't need to tell you anything."

"Why? Why can't you talk to me?"

"You're not supposed to care. No one is."

"Damnit Casey!" Severide snapped, causing him to wince. "Why the hell do you think I'm here? Out of some sort of obligation?"

"Forgot to change my emergency contact details. I'm sorry. They shouldn't have called you."

"Matt, I am one step away from kicking this guy's ass… in fact I'm way past it… I soon as I first saw him I should have…"

"He loves me."

"What? Matt… he's put you in the hospital, they're admitting you overnight… he doesn't love you."

"Don't say that. It was an accident."

"An accident? How is breaking your wrist an accident?"

"I made a mistake… I des…"

"You deserved it?" Severide shook his head. "No one deserves this."

"I do…" he replied quietly. "Wait… they're admitting me? They can't," he shook his head adamantly, "It's only my wrist… they can't keep me here…"

"They can. They suspect abuse Casey. They can keep you here tonight. You've been here far too often for their liking. It's for your own safety. And don't you dare try signing out AMA. I'm not giving you a ride home if you do."

"I don't need you."

"You've called him?"

"He'll be here soon," he stated plainly, "If you're in danger of hitting the man that loves me then you better leave."

"Casey, we both know what's going on here… you're not an idiot, you practically told me I know what's happening… the staff here certainly do, they'll call the cops…"

"No they won't. It was only an accident."

"And how many more accidents are you gonna have?"

"You should leave. Don't worry, I'll take you off my emergency contacts."


	85. What's Wrong?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another prompt from the lovely Stingray “You’re never this quiet. What’s wrong?”

Casey watched silently as Severide took his fresh mug of coffee and strode straight back to his quarters. Moments later he had stood up and was following him.

Before Severide could close the door he invited himself in. "You're never this quiet. What's wrong?" As he stepped closer to Severide he realised. "You're sweating… you're sick…"

"Yeah well done, Casey," Severide replied dryly as he sat down on the bed, his head was throbbing, it felt like a herd of elephants were parading around in there. "Great observational skills."

Casey let Severide's comments slide. "Why are you here?"

Severide let out a sigh, it was easier just to tell the truth, he knew full well that Casey wouldn't stop with the questions. "I felt fine this morning."

"No, you didn't."

Another sigh. "No, I didn't. Look, I'm just gonna tough it out. Exactly like you would… remember that time you collapsed? Turned out you had a really bad case of the flu? Well this is just a twenty-four hour bug. I'll live."

"All right…" Casey accepted, "But you're staying at mine after shift."

That brought a smile to his face. "Yeah? You gonna play doctor?"

"Of course."


	86. Power Play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: SEXUAL CONTENT

"C'mere you…" Severide practically dragged Casey's naked body onto the bed. He was still dripping wet from the shower.

"You should have joined me." Casey stared down at him as he straddled his waist. "Maybe I should have dragged you in."

"Oh you into that now?"

"You think I'd rather you were in control?" His eyes glistened in the light as expression took a darker tone. He grabbed Severide's wrists and moved them upwards towards the head of the bed.

"You gonna have your way with me Matthew Casey?"

"Don't call me Matthew."

Severide was swiftly moved onto his front. Casey straddled him once again. He grabbed his wrists but suddenly Casey was on his back. Their positions reversed.

"I'm stronger than you are." They were both breathing harshly now.

"You're bigger than I am." Casey strained under the strong grip. Severide really was using his body weight against him.

"You're so turned on right now…"

"Yeah… you gonna leave me lying aching here all night or what?"

"Maybe I should…" Severide's hand grabbed his hardened member.

"Kel…" he moaned.

"I love it when you moan my name. Say it again."

"Kelly…" it was out of frustration. He needed release.

"Turn over."

He didn't move.

"I said turn over."

"I'm saying no. I don't want to play games."

He was forcefully twisted around. He groaned as his head was pushed into the pillow. His aching member was trapped between him and the bed covers.

Severide's lips left Casey's back. Leaving a row of red marks. His own erection was throbbing.

Casey cried out as he was prepared and entered. He settled into the movements. He'd caught his breath from the initial penetration but then it hitched as soon as Severide hit the spot. He came messily on the bed covers as Severide released his load inside him.

"Good?"

"Good."


	87. Little Bit Broken

Severide rushed past the police officers, his heart was hammering away inside his chest, he pulled back to the privacy curtain and slipped into the bay he'd been directed to.

"Matt?"

There was a nurse by his side. Cleaning up his wounds. Casey opened his eyes at the sound of the familiar and very welcome voice. He smiled. But even that hurt. "Hey… long time no see…"

"Yeah, well, you should stop getting yourself into all sorts of mess." Severide smiled down at him. Relief sent shock waves through his system as he took in Casey's bruises. "You ok? Well, obviously…"

"Broken some ribs… erm…" he tried recalling the long list of injuries, "… fractured eye socket… need surgery on my wrist, think they're doin' that tomorrow morning… oh cracked my skull… apparently they're not worried about that… for now…"

"Little bit broken then…"

"Just a little," he smiled, he really was on some good drugs, though he was worried he would soon succumb to the sleep that was beckoning him. "Really I'm fi… I'll be ok."

"You're not allowed to scare me like that again."

"The great Kelly Severide… scared? I think I have taken one too many hits to the head…"

"Don't do it again."

"Hey… it's not like I had much say in the matter…"

"I know, I know… maybe I should just forbid you from ever leaving the house."

"Forbid me?" he was grinning up at Severide now but soon his smile fell, "You saw the videos?"

"Yeah… didn't make for pleasant viewing…"

"How about this… I promise never to get involved with drug dealers again… I mean, to be honest with you I didn't really enjoy the experience myself…"

"At least we got you back," Severide nodded.

"Yeah… how?"

"It's a long story."

"Tell me…"

"When you're not full of morphine I will. I promise."


	88. Pom Poms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from the fabulous Stingray “You’re an idiot. I married an idiot.”

"You're an idiot. I married an idiot." Casey just shook his head as he looked down at Severide. Really, this shouldn't be a surprise. Severide was a hot head. He often acted first and thought later. This time it got him shot. Casey had received the call and headed straight to the hospital and was relieved to see Severide awake and smiling.

"What the hell did you think was gonna happen?" he questioned as he gazed at the white bandage wrapped around Severide's arm.

"Well… I didn't think I was gonna get shot at…"

"You didn't think you were gonna get shot at? You walked right into a drug dealers apartment demanding that he tell you the truth about that arson case…"

"He is in custody…" Severide gave a small shrug with his good arm.

"And you're sat in the ER with a hole in your arm… you're an arson investigator not a cop…"

"You'd have done the same," Severide commented with a knowing smile.

"I…" but he conceded, "Yeah, suppose I would have… Are you really ok?"

"Worried about me?"

"Always… but I shouldn't be… you should be behind a desk… "

"You know I like action way too much."

"You'll get back to fighting fires soon… if that's what you want. You've been getting stronger and stronger with physio."

"Well, I do have you as my cheer squad… Oh that's a good idea…"

"No. No way Kelly Severide."

"But you'd look so cute with pom poms…"


	89. My Fault

Severide had cornered him in the showers after the whole firehouse had spent the best part of the afternoon and night at a hotel fire. Severide was looking at the various shades of bruises on his arms and chest, the scratches, wounds and marks that marred his flesh. "Matt, if Dawson..."

"If it was Gabby don't you think I'd be able to defend myself?" he questioned, his voice was hushed, worried that not everyone had gone to their bunks yet, and there was a well-played look of disbelief across his face. This conversation had started before the alarms had rung and they'd had it many times before.

"No," Severide replied simply.

"No?"

"No, because you're scared you'll hurt her worse than she's hurting you." Severide knew him too well, he looked away, dropped his eye contact as Severide continued, "This has been going on for months..."

Casey nodded, still not quite looking at Severide.

"Ok," Severide nodded, glad of the admission. "Well, you've got to leave her."

"I can't..."

"Why not?" Severide questioned.

"I just..." he tried.

"Just what? Enjoy all of this?" Severide almost laughed.

"It's my fault."

"Your fault?"

"I'm always forgetting to do stuff or get things from the store..." He's still having trouble after his head injury. Severide knew that. He was still forgetting names for items right in front of him. It was rare but it still happened. It just takes him a minute to think it through. Fortunately when the adrenaline of a rescue coursed through his body he was just fine. Very fortunate.

"I don't believe that; you're the most organised person I know. Besides if I forgot to fetch something from the store would that warrant someone hitting me?" Severide looked down at Casey's arm, "What did you do to earn a knife wound?"

"I... I don't even know..."

"You're ending it Casey, as soon as shift is over you're telling her that it's over," Severide said firmly, "I can be with you if it's easier?"

"I'll do it on my own."


	90. Needles

Severide was sitting as close to Casey as he possibly could, the stool he was perched on was as close as possible to the hospital bed that Casey was sat on the edge of. His hand was placed on Casey's thigh, a small comforting gesture as the doctor continued to examine him, every so often he heard him wince in pain. He'd refused painkillers when they arrived at the ER and refused them before they took him for an x-ray.

"I'm gonna give you a shot for the pain before I sort out a sling..." the doctor began as she took out a syringe and some pain relief from the closest cart.

Casey shook his head. "I'm fine, don't need anything. Just sort the sling and I can go, right?"

"Matt, you've broken your collarbone, have some damn painkillers," Severide interjected.

But Casey was shaking his head fervently now, eyes focused on the syringe in the doctors hand.

"Matt? Baby what's wrong?" Severide peered into his eyes. "You're scared of needles," he surmised softly.

"I'm not scared."

"You are... and that's all right," Severide spoke gently, "Just look at me for moment will ya? Look at me..."

Casey wrenched his eyes away from the syringe and gave his focus to Severide. "Sorry, I'm such an idiot... being scared of needles... I don't know why I..."

Severide was smiling at him almost serenely. "I love you."

He just frowned. " I... I love you too... why are you looking at me like that?"

"It's all done."

"What?" Casey's eyes followed Severide's round to the empty syringe the doctors hand, "Oh... thanks..."

"Didn't even feel it did you?" Severide smiled at him.

"No," he replied sheepishly, "Thank you... don't tell anyone..."

"I wouldn't dare."


	91. Playing Hero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from the fabulous Stingray! “I can’t reach my back, can you give me a hand?”

Severide was lounging on the couch, Casey was in the bathroom, he'd heard the shower stop running a few minutes ago and soon the door opened, Casey had a small towel wrapped around his waist, there was steam rising of his skin. "Come here…" he smiled.

"Thought the doc said no strenuous activities?" Severide raised an eyebrow.

"That's not why I need you," he grinned, "C'mere."

"What do you need?" Severide stood up and padded over the open bathroom door.

"Can't reach my back." He held out the burn ointment that he'd been given in the ER only the day before. "Can you give me a hand?"

"Course I can," Severide replied, "Turn around."

Casey almost flinched at Severide's touch. "Your hands are cold," he explained.

Severide just smiled, rubbed his hands together and smeared some more ointment onto Casey's muscular back. "That better?"

"That's good… really good…"

Severide's hands trailed up to Casey's neck, he massaged his tense neck and shoulders until he felt the man relax. "You scared me yesterday," he stated.

"I was little worried too," Casey admitted. He'd never admit that in front of anyone else but Severide.

"You were worried?" he said, a little surprised at the admission but pleased Casey was speaking freely to him.

"Just a little."

"Next time you decide to play hero… don't."

"It could have been worse," Casey replied.

"Yeah the flames could have burned all the way through, they almost did… some of these are second degree…"

"I know…"

"You're in pain?" Severide questioned, worried, Casey always made him worry.

"Just a little."

Severide sighed, and gently turned Casey around so they were facing each other. "C'mere…" he pulled Casey into his arms, "I love you."

"I love you too and just so you know it really wasn't my intention to go up in flames, I hate it when you worry."


	92. Halo

Hadley was playing games with Severide. No one could prove that he was setting the fires and Severide had just blown up in front of him, Casey had struggled to hold him back. "Not here, not here…" He'd warned him because there were people watching, people stood with camera phones. "Kelly…" he continued warningly.

Severide let Hadley go.

Casey let Severide go. He exchanged a worried glance with Boden as Severide walked over to the squad rig across the road. Casey saw something from the corner of his eye.

"Kelly!" he screamed as a car ploughed towards Severide.

Severide turned at the sound of the terror in Casey's voice.

It was too late. The car wasn't stopping. Severide wasn't going to be able to move fast enough.

Casey ran out into the road.

Severide felt something heavy hit him. He heard the smash of glass. Screeching tires. A thud. More screeching tires. He pulled himself up from the ground. There were voices all around him. "Oh God…" he scrambled over to Casey. He was lying only feet away from him unmoving. A pool of blood spread like a halo around his blond hair.

There was a mass of movement around Casey's still form.

"Matt!" Severide's voice desperately called to him, it was tinged with fear. "You're gonna be ok, you hear me? You're gonna be fine…"

"Kelly step back, let them work," a voice commanded.

"Is he breathing? Please tell me he's breathing?" Severide questioned as he was pulled away from Casey. "Please tell me he's ok…"

Shay looked up at him, a telling look in her eyes.

"Oh God…" Severide's knees buckled and he fell to the ground. He watched through teary eyes as they intubated Casey. Watched as Shay pounded on his chest. He prayed. For the first time in years Severide prayed.

"We've got a pulse, let's load him and go…" Shay said, she glanced over to Severide and gave him a small smile.

Severide rushed along with the gurney, squeezing the ambu-bag to keep Casey breathing, to keep oxygen circulating around his broken and battered body, he was strapped onto a backboard, a c-collar held his neck rigid.

Severide glanced around. "Where's the driver? Where's the car who hit him?"

"Hit and run. Hadley was at the wheel," Shay explained as they loaded Casey's still unconscious form into the back of the ambulance.

Severide had never felt more guilty in his entire life. Hadley had been aiming for him not Casey.


	93. Concealer

Severide knocked once on the door, he entered Casey's quarters without waiting for permission. "Casey, we really need to talk…"

"I'm not talking just so you can satisfy your own need." Casey didn't bother looking up from his paperwork

"I picked you up from the ER two weeks ago and as far as I know you're still seeing this guy," he began. He had to get through to Casey, had to get him out of this relationship. It wasn't healthy.

"It was consensual," Casey countered. They had similar conversations before.

"Consensual?" he almost laughed, "Matt, you needed twenty-eight stitches."

"That… that was a mistake…"

"Yeah? And how many more mistakes are there gonna be?" he said incredulously.

Annoyed at Severide's persistence Casey spun round to face him and all but yelled, "Do you see any cuts and bruises? No you don't."

"You're wearing long sleeves," he pointed out.

"I like it rough, you know I do. What I don't like is being questioned by you, you have no right," Casey spoke harshly.

"That's not rough Matt," he shook his head, "That's abuse."

"My private life is my business, you gave up the right to know anything when you slept with that woman…"

"Matt that was a mistake, how many times do I have to tell you that? I didn't hide it from you. I told you the day after it happened…"

"It shouldn't have happened in the first place," Casey had to bite back his anger, his door was closed but that wouldn't stop prying eyes.

"I know, I know…" he replied, "And I've never regretted something so much in my whole life."

"Are you done?" Casey asked.

"What?" he questioned at Casey's abruptness.

Casey turned back to his desk. "I have work to do. Don't you?"

"You're wearing concealer," he observed quietly.

"What are you talking about?" Casey questioned a little too quickly.

"You're wearing concealer on your neck," he said simply, "Don't worry, I doubt anyone else has noticed."

"I'm n…"

Severide continued softly, ignoring his protest, "What did he do to you?"

Casey looked away, he couldn't face Severide now, couldn't let the man see into his eyes, he feared he'd break down and tell him he thought he was going to die last night and how he'd never come so hard before. He was ashamed. He was ashamed and confused.

Severide knew he'd get nothing from Casey. "Well, if you ever need me I'm only at the end of the phone."


	94. Hold Me

"You all right?" Severide questioned, watching Casey's careful steps as he entered the apartment, bruised ribs hurt like hell, and Severide was sure the whole of Casey's right eye would be swollen in a few more hours despite the ice pack they'd given him in the ER.

"I just need to get some sleep," Casey replied.

"Ok, take my bed, I'll sleep on the couch," he told him, "I'll get you some more pillows, I know you…"

"I'll sleep on the couch," Casey said.

"Sure, if that's what you want." He wasn't going to try and sway Casey otherwise, it had taken a lot of effort to come over to his place after everything that had happened. "In the morning we can go and get your stuff and maybe we should change the locks at your place…"

"Why?"

"Erm…" he was dumbfounded, "Matt, you have to leave him."

"He loves me," Casey said, and he really meant it.

He sighed heavily. "I don't even know what to say to that anymore."

"There's nothing to say."

Less than half an hour later after a rejected offer of something to eat Casey lay on Severide's couch in the dark. His eyes were wide open, or eye since his right was now swollen shut courtesy a white and gold lamp, he was staring at nothing. Thinking about everything and thinking about nothing at all. He lay like that for hours though it seemed like very little time passed. He winced as he stood up. Then he walked into the coffee table and swore. Since when had Severide moved his coffee table? Casey supposed after months of telling him that he wanted to change the place around a bit he finally had. Of course what he didn't know was that Severide had moved his furniture around when he and Casey had split.

He heard Severide's bedroom door open. "Matt? You ok?"

"Not really," Casey admitted as the main light flooded the lounge area.

"You should have turned the light on," Severide commented with a small smile as he noticed the slightly displaced coffee table.

"I should have done a lot of things."

Severide was walking up to him, nothing was going to stop him from wrapping his arms around Casey's battered and weary body. He felt Casey tense.

Casey stood still as Severide's arms wrapped around him, he always gave the best hugs, but he didn't lean into this one, he stood still until he felt Severide pull back. "Don't. Just hold me. Please."


	95. Nurse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from Stingray! “Don’t do that.”

"Kelly stop," Casey warned him for the fourth time during their journey home from the hospital. Who knew making Thanksgiving dinner could turn into such a chaotic event requiring thirty-two stitches.

"What?" Severide looked over from the passenger side of the truck, only innocence portrayed across his face.

"Don't do that," he nodded towards his arm, "You'll need a new bandage if you don't stop fiddling with it."

"Maybe I want a new bandage… you are a good nurse," Severide teased, "You could dress up and…"

Casey cut him off. "How many painkillers did they give you?"

"None," he replied quickly, "None, too stubborn just like you. I had none."

"I saw them give you a shot, Kelly."

"Yeah… they did… that was…" Severide trailed off, clearly unable to think of an excuse, "It hurt, Matty, it hurt…"

"I know," he nodded, he glanced over to him for a moment. "Doesn't hurt now, does it?"

"I'm all… fluffy and kinda floaty… like a cloud… I'm a cloud of fluff… and I'm so tired Matty… I'm tired…"

"Go to sleep," Casey smiled, eyes focused ahead on the road.

"What if I don't wake up? What if… what if you don't wake up?"

"I'm not going to sleep, I'm driving," Casey replied, "And you will wake up."

"You have to be so careful… you can't ever sleep and not wake up… you can't… you can't leave."

"I'm not leaving you."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Now, go to sleep, I'll wake you when we're home."


	96. Just Do It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stingray suggested dislocating Casey’s shoulder and I can never say no to hurting Casey.

Severide and his crew were waiting outside the building. Just in case they were needed. They'd come to the scene after finishing off at a pin-in accident nearby. Truck 81 were inside the building, a simple elevator malfunction. It wasn't long until the victims had been rescued and 81 were heading out of the building.

"What happened to him?" Shay asked as Casey and Herrmann approached the back of 61 with a barely conscious man in their grip.

"He erm… he panicked," Casey said as he handed off the victim to Shay and Dawson.

"So you knocked him out?" Shay laughed.

"He knocked himself out," he replied.

"Whatever you say ,Casey… you all right?" she questioned as she noticed him wince.

"Fine," he gave a short nod. "Just pulled something." He smiled and walked away from the ambulance.

As Casey turned away Herrmann walked alongside him. "Just pulled something? The guy practically tackled you, then flung you out the way!"

Casey grinned. "Be thankful he didn't land on you, we'd have been peeling you up off the floor."

"Small and mighty," Herrmann stated with a large grin.

"Get the rig the packed up," Casey said as he fell behind. He stopped by Severide. "Just here for the view?" he teased.

"And doughnuts," Severide replied with a nod over to the store at the end of the block.

"That's cops," Casey supplied.

"Well, I do like a good doughnut…"

Casey just shot him a bemused look.

"You better go and tidy up all the mess your truck boys made," Severide said simply before turning to Tony, "Let's get back to the station."

When Truck 51 returned back to the firehouse Severide was sitting in the common room, he watched as Casey's crew filed into the room and got back to whatever it is they were all doing before the alarms had rang out.

"Where's Casey?" Severide asked to no one in particular when his truck counterpart didn't make an appearance with the others.

Hermann gave a small shrug. "He was still by the rig, he took quite a hit." He rolled his eyes as he added, "Says he's fine."

When Severide ventured onto the apparatus floor Casey was no longer by Truck 81. Instead he found him sitting on the bench in front of his locker, gingerly holding his arm to his chest.

"What's wrong with your arm?" Severide asked as he walked up to him.

"I'm fine." Casey looked up slowly, as if he'd only just realised Severide had appeared.

"Herrmann says you took a hit? What happened?"

"Guy panicked in the elevator," Casey answered.

"So what's wrong with your arm?"

"I just got pushed to the side, think I've just pulled something in my shoulder," Casey explained.

"Pushed? More like tackled then flung like a rag doll," Herrmann supplied as he'd suddenly appeared. He was walking up to his locker.

"Is 61 back yet?" Severide asked Herrmann, ignoring the look of protest on Casey's face.

"I'll go see." Herrmann turned back without even opening his locker up.

Severide turned back to Casey. "It's dislocated, isn't it?"

"Maybe."

"How the hell did you get your turnout gear off?" Severide said with a smile, Casey was too stubborn for his own good sometimes. Sometimes. More like all of the time.

"Very slowly and carefully."

"And why didn't you see a medic at the scene?"

"They'd all left." Casey shrugged with his right shoulder.

Severide knelt down in front of him. "You realise you have a severe lack of self-preservation, right?"

"Can't you just pop it back in?"

"What?"

"Just un-dislocate it... please."

Severide sighed, "Fine." He could never say no to Casey. It was his eyes.

Herrmann walked back into the locker room to find Severide examining Casey's now bare shoulder.

"Will you quit prodding it!" Casey protested.

"It's definitely dislocated," Severide nodded.

"So stop touching it." He tried to pull back but Severide had a firm hold on his unhurt side.

"You two need a room?" Herrmann teased. They both shot him a disgruntled look. "61 aren't back yet, you want me to call another…"

"No," Casey replied quickly. "It's fine, thanks Herrmann."

Herrmann took that as his cue to leave and left the two of them in piece.

"Matt this is going to hurt," Severide warned.

"Just do it."


	97. Breaking Doors

Hallie was dead.

Severide was staying over at Casey's place.

Casey was a mess.

Severide drove him to the funeral.

Casey gave a small speech.

Severide drove him home after the wake.

Casey locked himself in the bathroom.

Severide broke down the door when he heard him crying.

Casey broke down in his Severide's arms.

Severide held him as he shook with sobs.

Casey fell asleep in Severide's arms.

Severide would never tell a soul.


	98. Funny

"You look awful." Severide looked up from his desk as Casey slipped quietly into his quarters that morning.

"And you're beautiful," Casey teased as he leant back on the closed door.

"I mean it, Matt," he said as he took in Casey's pale and weary appearance. "Have you eaten?"

"Of course I have," Casey replied almost indignantly.

"You have a habit of skipping meals when you're…"

"You just saw me eating breakfast."

Severide half laughed. "Yeah, yeah I did. So you followed me in here because…"

"Oh I just thought you wanted your morning blow job," he said it with the most serious face that Severide almost believed him. "I need your report from… from…"

"Matt?" Severide questioned as Casey trailed off and became ten shades paler.

"I… erm… I feel funny… I erm…" he coughed out as he tried to grab hold of the door handle for support.

"What do you mean you feel funny?" he frowned but then Casey's knees gave way and he shot up from his seat and caught him just before he hit the floor. "Matt?" he tried to rouse him but it didn't work. "I need some help in here!" he called out.

Two hours later Severide was sitting by Casey in the ER. He'd gone into anaphylactic shock. The doctors weren't sure what had caused it, presumably something he'd eaten for breakfast. He had an appointment with a specialist later that day to see if they could get to the bottom of it.

"That was Boden," Severide put the phone down.

"You need to go?" Casey asked tiredly, his eyes were only half open.

"Yeah," he nodded sadly. "Are you going to be ok?"

"Probably just sleep," Casey muttered.

"All right," he placed a hand on Casey's arm, "Call me if anything happens, let me know when you need a ride home."

"Don't worry, I'll get a cab… oh could you drive my truck home… if you can get a ride back to your car afterwards anyway or just…"

"Stop talking, Matt. I'll sort it."


	99. Sacrifice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by a conversation with Isensiel. Little gap filler for 1.24.

"Casey stop!" Severide called after him as he followed him out of the locker room.

"What?" he turned, agitated because he was exhausted, and Severide knew it wasn't just the previous call that had caused his exhaustion. "I want to get to the hospital... what do you want?"

"I heard what happened in the Chapel, Boden probably has too."

"Ok," he just shrugged as though it was of little importance.

"Ok? That's all you have to say?"

"We all got out of there."

"You could have got out of there without trying to sacrifice yourself. You're being reckless and..."

"Reckless? You're one to talk. I kept my crew safe in a bad situation. You'd have done exactly the same."

"Is Herrmanns life really worth more than yours?" Severide questioned as he began to move away.

Casey stopped, his back was facing Severide as he replied simply, "Yes."

Severide didn't know what to say. "Matt, I know you're going through a tough..."

"Going through a tough time has nothing to do with it," he stated, "I have no one, Kelly. He has everyone."


	100. Grumpy Pants

"33 year old firefighter, Matt Casey. Three storey fall. Open femur fracture, loss of consciousness at the scene but alert and responsive to all stimuli. He's had five of morphine."

Severide rushed along with the gurney as Casey was taken into the trauma room. He'd left his crew to help the rest of 81 overhaul the scene, he wouldn't be missed.

"How's the pain Matt?" the ER doctor looked over him once he'd been transferred onto the hospital bed. There was a c-collar restricting his movements.

Before Casey could reply Severide spoke, "Give him some more morphine..."

"Sev, I'm fine…" he muttered as his clothes were cut off.

Very soon Casey was attached to all sorts of medical equipment and his initial examination was complete. X-rays had been taken and the c-collar was eventually removed.

Severide was still in the trauma room, stood in the corner, out of professional courtesy and the fact that he looked like he'd take a swing at anyone who ordered him to leave. He finally got to move back to Casey's side as the doctor spoke.

"All right Matt, you've been really lucky, the open fracture to your femur is the worst of it and it's not a complicated case," the doctor explained, "We're going to splint your leg down here, ortho is going to look over your x-ray, you'll need surgery so they'll schedule you for that. It will hurt so we'll give you something to relax, then we'll get you admitted. Is there anyone we can call for you?"

"No one..." he moved his head from side to side slightly, everything hurt, which he supposed was a good thing. "How long will I be out?" he asked.

"At least six to eight weeks," the man replied. "It could have been worse," he added at the look on Casey's face.

Casey was given some more painkillers and the world around him slowed, he relaxed into the bed as the staff prepared to splint his leg. He was very aware that Severide was still right by his side but unaware of the soothing words that were leaving his lips.

Despite the painkillers Casey cried out when his leg was splinted. Severide had watched the entire process and he hit the deck as Casey screamed in agony when the bones realigned.

Casey hadn't been worried much until Severide had disappeared from his sight. "Sev?"

"He's fainted," the nurse supplied.

Severide was out cold for a good five minutes. One hour later and one CT scan later he was admitted to the hospital for observation for a minute skull fracture. He was sporting two black eyes and a small laceration on his forehead.

Casey was scheduled for surgery on his leg the next day.

They were admitted to the same room and Severide had immediately taken the TV controller.

"Are you serious?" Casey groaned as Severide flipped quickly through the channels. "You're supposed to have a concussion. You shouldn't even be able to watch TV."

"Just 'cause I can handle a concussion better than you…"

"You wait," Casey warned, "You'll be puking your guts up soon enough. At least just pick something and stick with it." Casey sighed, letting his head fall back into the bed, the painkillers were wearing off now and he couldn't find a comfortable position.

Severide switched off the TV.

"You do feel ill, don't you?" Casey asked, glancing over at Severide's pale face.

"I'm fine."

"Right…"

Severide sighed heavily. "You cannot tell anyone what happened."

He grinned. "What are you gonna do if I tell? Faint on me?" He laughed at his own words. "Ha... faint on me… get it?"

Severide didn't look impressed but he was desperately trying not to crack a smile because Casey was actually laughing at himself. He was speaking so freely since he'd been given several large doses of morphine. He'd needed it though although, being Casey, he'd never admit to the pain, just like Severide was stubbornly insisting he wasn't feeling the effects of his fractured skull.

Casey was still laughing, and a small snort brought Severide's attention back to him, he smiled. "You should get high on morphine more often. It's adorable."

"I am not adorable."

"You're pouting."

"I am not pouting."

"I may be concussed but that is definitely a pout."

"I am not pouting."

Severide's head was throbbing. "Will you shut up and sleep?"

"Grumpy pants," Casey muttered.

"Well, jokes on you 'cause I'm not wearing pants."

Casey's expression changed suddenly. He started trying to move off the bed.

"Matt, what are you doing?" he questioned quickly, halting Casey's movements, besides there was no way Casey was going to make it off the bed very easily with his leg wrapped and splinted as it was.

"I'm going home."

"You have surgery in the morning," Severide reminded him calmly.

"Yeah… I don't want surgery in the morning," he shook his head adamantly, "I don't want to be here. I need to go home."

"Matt… Matty, you're all right, you're ok, the surgery's gonna be fine, your leg's gonna be fine," Severide tried to reassure him, at least he wasn't trying to get off the bed anymore. The morphine had eroded Casey's walls, it had made him adorably cute, but it also revealed his worried thoughts, the thoughts he'd very rarely admit.

"Sorry…"

"Don't worry about it. You think you can try and get some sleep?"

Casey shook his head. "No."

"Ok, well, in that case I want you to lie back down, try and relax a little, you're gonna have to listen to me ramble on about… all sorts… you'll soon sleep."


End file.
